“HAPPY DEPENDENCE DAY!”

Isaiah 30:15-17, “God, the Master, The Holy of Israel, has this solemn counsel: “Your salvation requires you to turn back to Me and stop your silly efforts to save yourselves. Your strength will come from settling down in complete DEPENDENCE ON ME—The very thing you’ve been unwilling to do” (MSG)

They keep it under glass that seals out any air getting to it. When it’s not on display, it’s kept underground in a vault – actually a bombproof vault. It’s the most important document in the history of the United States. Of course, it’s the Declaration of Independence! The men who signed it that hot July 4th in Philadelphia knew it was very important, but I wonder if they could have possibly conceived what a sacred piece of paper it would become to the nation that it launched. 

Here were subjects of the English king daring to declare their Independence from their king! It changed their lives forever. It changed the world forever. And once a year, every Fourth of July, America stops to remember that Independence Day. 

For America’s Founding Fathers, it was a Declaration of Independence from their king that changed everything. For you, as a child of God, it is your Declaration of DEPENDENCE ON YOUR KING that changes everything! Proverbs 3:5-6, “Trust God from the bottom of your heart; don’t try to figure out everything on your own. Listen for God’s voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; He’s the one who will keep you on track.” (MSG). And yet, we do anything but trust God in everything we do and everywhere we go. I mean can you imagine if we truly relied on God like that?! Where would we be, or better yet, where could we have avoided being, had we only trusted God in this manner, in the first place. The mistakes we never would have made; the bad relationships we would never have entered; the toxic friendships we could’ve avoided being poisoned by; the broken hearts we would have never had to spend the majority of our adulthood healing. If only we trusted God enough to allow Him to keep us on track as the Scripture says, we would have never crashed, derailed, detoured, driven off the cliff, went the wrong way, crossed lanes, or had to make countless, unnecessary U-turns in life!  

So many missteps we would never have stumbled over if only we trusted God to keep our footsteps ordered. Psalm 37:23, “The steps of a [good and righteous] man are directed and established by the Lord, And He delights in his way [and blesses his path].” (AMP) If we walked in God’s ordered steps, our path would’ve been blessed instead of burdened! So many valley’s we could’ve been rerouted around; so many mountains we would never have had to unceasingly hike around, if we allowed God to order our steps and remind us to speak to the mountain instead of allowing the mountain to silence us. If we dared to trust God, follow God, obey God, rely on God and depend on God our footing would never have had to stumble, trip, slip and fall.  Psalm 18:33, “He makes my feet like hinds’ feet [able to stand firmly and tread safely on paths of testing and trouble]; He sets me [securely] upon my high places.” (AMP) Friends, today is a good day to allow your Christian Walk to be solely directed by the Lord. After all, who else is able to keep your feet firm, safe and secure, even during times of testing and trouble?! You see when we depend on God to order our steps, we can avoid a lot of pitfalls. But then there are also those times of disobedience where we deliberately chose the wrong path to travel, and yet even in those times of well-deserved testing and trouble, God still loved us so much that He set our feet upon high places, firmly, safely and securely. Who wouldn’t depend on a God like that? A God that keeps you from falling when you deserved to be knocked down! A God who watches you discard His Word, the road map for your life, and therefore deciding to go your own way. And still, He remains in contact, waiting for the moment you ask Him for yet another U-turn! But far too often we don’t ask. Because then we’d have to be honest that we chose the path we’re on. Which means we would have to stop blaming everyone else for all the bumps in the road, the hard ground, the destination to absolutely nowhere that has anything to do with God’s purpose and plans for our lives. Yes, if we did that, it would require us to let humility take over. Which further means letting God lead instead of us, and dare we give up our independence and have such a thing happen! Saints, we have to take our hands off the wheel and let God drive, even in moments when we don’t know where He’s taking us, He hasn’t shared the map or the destination, and He most definitely does not have the GPS blaring through the speakers dropping us hints along the highway. We simply have to learn to trust God, and for many of us that’s not such an easy task to accomplish. But in order to let God drive, we have to depend on Him, trusting that He has somewhere great in mind just for us! Jeremiah 29:10-11, “This is God’s Word on the subject…I’ll show up and take care of you as I promised and bring you back home. I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.” (MSG) How can we possibly struggle with trust issues with a promise like that from One who cannot lie?! How can we possibly struggle to depend on a God who has a purpose, plan and future already in place for us, that no one can hinder, but us and our need for independence from Him?! 

You know what we need? We need to Develop a Desperate Dependence on God! One in which we don’t do anything in life without consulting Him first. In other words, we don’t marry; we don’t get divorced; get a mortgage; have children; pick out a car; go away to school; open a church; start a ministry; begin a business; accept a job offer; relocate or anything else without His perfect counsel. And if we did, can you imagine the many pitfalls we would never have encountered!  

But unfortunately, when it comes to God running our lives, we’ve all declared our Independence at one time or another! Even if our theology compels us to officially trust God, we are, for the most part, “Sinatra-ites“. Yeah, you remember Frank Sinatra’s signature song, “I did it my way“! Now if that’s too out-dated for some of you, I’ll just say this is truly a Burger King generation, whether you’re right or wrong, you can still “Have it your way”! Even for us Christians, that’s often how we really live. We’ll figure this out by ourselves, we’ll find a way, we’ll make it happen, we won’t wait, we’ll find a way to get it now. We tend to depend on our own plans, our schemes, our talent, our cleverness, our persuasiveness, our hard work, our connections, even our manipulation. We’ll count on our programs or our own strength. But one of the best quotes I’ve read on this matter is by W.R. Inge, it says, “Christianity promises to make men free; it never promises to make them independent.” That’s why we need to declare our Dependence Daily! Our God desires to free us from our Sin, but not so we can claim Independence from our Savior! Galatians 5:1, “It was for this freedom that Christ set us free [completely liberating us]; therefore keep standing firm and do not be subject again to a yoke of slavery [which you once removed].” (AMP); Romans 8:32, “And you will know the truth [regarding salvation], and the truth will set you free [from the penalty of sin].” (AMP); 2 Corinthians 3:17, “Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty [emancipation from bondage, true freedom].” (AMP) Yes, God wants us FREE from Sin, but NOT INDEPENDENT of our SAVIOR! We are not free to do what we WANT, we are freed to do His WILL! 

In fact, Jesus makes it very clear how anything that matters in our life really happens. He said, “I am the vine; you are the branches.” In other words, the fruit of your life doesn’t come from you; it comes from Jesus, through you, like the life of the vine comes through the branch! He goes on to say, “If a man remains in Me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from Me, you can do nothing.” Independent of God, You can accomplish, Nothing that matters. Nothing eternal. Nothing significant. Nothing that really works over the long haul into leaving a lasting legacy. You can do Absolutely Nothing Independent of HIM! He doesn’t say, “Without Me, you can’t do much.” He said, You Can Do NOTHING! The word ‘Nothing’ means, ‘Not anything; something of no importance or concern; nought; not at all; to no purpose; there is no prospect of success or agreement; nothing is happening.’ Now tell me, who in their right mind would want to live such a life?! Especially, since God promised, “If a man REMAINS in Me and I in him, HE WILL BEAR MUCH FRUIT” The Contemporary English Version says it like this, “…you will produce LOTS of fruit…” The Amplified Bible says, “Whoever LIVES in Me and I in him bears MUCH (ABUNDANT) fruit…” And The Message Bible says, “When you’re JOINED with me and I with you…the HARVEST is sure to be ABUNDANT.” In a Nutshell: If you make sure you remain Faithful, He’ll make sure you remain Fruitful! You see, the size of your life Depends on how big your Dependency on God is, as opposed to the size of your own efforts! He says just remain in Me; live in Me; be joined to Me, and what do you reap from that relationship? Much Fruit; Lots of Fruit; Much Abundant Fruit; and a Harvest that’s Sure to be Abundant! That word ‘sure’ is defined as, ‘completely confident; certain to receive, get or do; undoubtedly true; completely reliable; not to fail.’ Its Old French ‘sur’, from Latin ‘securus’ literally means, ‘free from care.’ Which means, I don’t have to worry about God’s promise to me about my harvest, because it is SURE! I am free of care, fret, panic, worry, stress, back-up plans, and the like, because when I depend completely on God, remaining in Him, living in Him, joined to Him, my promise of a harvest that bears Much Fruit; Lots of Fruit; Much Abundant Fruit; is a SURE Thing! Therefore, I can be, ‘completely confident and certain that I’ll receive, get and do as He wills for me; I can be reassured that what He promised is undoubtedly true concerning me; every promise of His is completely reliable; and it will come to me and not fail.’ I reiterate, how do you not trust, rely on, depend on, a God like that?! These are His promises, and not one of them shall fall short of what He’s said! 

Numbers 23:19, “God is not a man, that He should lie, Nor a son of man, that He should repent. Has He said, and will He not do it? Or has He spoken and will He not make it good and fulfill it?” (AMP); 

Isaiah 55:8-11, “…Just as rain and snow descend from the skies and don’t go back until they’ve watered the earth, Doing their work of making things grow and blossom, producing seed for farmers and food for the hungry, So will the words that come out of My Mouth not come back empty-handed. They’ll do the work I sent them to do, they’ll complete the assignment I gave them.” (MSG); 

Jeremiah 1:12, “The Lord then said, “You are right, for I’m watching over My Word until it is fulfilled.” (CEB) 

Even When You Can’t Forget All You SEE, Always Remember What HE SAID! Because what He SAID, is SURE to Happen! 

I don’t know about you, but to me, that’s a pretty good trade off! I remain Dependent on God, and He Blesses Me for it! But isn’t that just like God? He doesn’t ask Everything of us. Just a little simple dependent obedience, and when we do, He gives more than we even asked for! For instance, give Him 10 percent, and He increases the 90 percent that’s remaining! What kind of math is that?! Malachi 3:10-12, “Bring all the tithes (the tenth) into the storehouse, so that there may be food in My house, and test Me now in this,” says the Lord of hosts, “if I will not open for you the windows of heaven and pour out for you [so great] a blessing until there is no more room to receive it.  Then I will rebuke the devourer (insects, plague) for your sake and he will not destroy the fruits of the ground, nor will your vine in the field drop its grapes [before harvest],” says the Lord of hosts. “All nations shall call you happy and blessed, for you shall be a land of delight,” says the Lord of hosts.” (AMP) So, we give Him 10 percent, and He not only gives us the 90 percent, but He opens the windows of heaven and pours us out so great a blessing until there is no room to receive it?! Say what you will, but I like the economy rules of heaven! And as an added bonus, he rebukes the devourer and commands all nations to call us blessed! Come on here God! And if that’s not enough, if we ask Him to meet a need, He turns around and meets every need! Philippians 4:19, “And my God will liberally supply (fill until full) your every need according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus.” (AMP) And just to show how awesome of a God He is, He even supersedes what we ask, think, hope, pray or dream of! Ephesians 3:20, “Now to Him who is able to [carry out His purpose and] do superabundantly more than all that we dare ask or think [infinitely beyond our greatest prayers, hopes, or dreams], according to His power that is at work within us,” (AMP) Which makes we wonder why do we dream so small? Why do we think inside the box, only? Why do we hope so haphazardly? Why do we pray so timidly? Why do we ask as beggars instead of His heirs? He’s just waiting to out-do anything we dare to think, dream, hope, pray or ask, so who wouldn’t trust and depend on a God like that?!

If we dare to depend on Him He’s waiting for us to just ask, seek and knock, so He can embarrass us by doing above and beyond all that we ask, seek or knock after! Matthew 7:7-8, “Ask and keep on asking and it will be given to you; seek and keep on seeking and you will find; knock and keep on knocking and the door will be opened to you.  For everyone who keeps on asking receives, and he who keeps on seeking finds, and to him who keeps on knocking, it will be opened.” (AMP) And all of this is granted based on faith. Faith in what? No, faith in Who! Faith in our God! A faith that trusts Him to give what we’ve asked for; to help us find what we’ve been seeking after; and to open the door of opportunity we’ve been knocking on. And none of that comes from our own power, might and strength. Only by our faith in God and dependence on Him! Hebrews 11:6, “But without faith it is impossible to [walk with God and] please Him, for whoever comes [near] to God must [necessarily] believe that God exists and that He rewards those who [earnestly and diligently] seek Him.” (AMP) Only God rewards people for seeking Him! How do you not trust Him? How do you not depend on Him? How do you not follow Him? He’s waiting with your reward, so when do you plan on having your dependence on Him show up to receive it?! 

Joni Eareckson Tada said that when she went to Africa, she was greeted by believers there who said, “Welcome to Africa, where our God is bigger. He is bigger because we need Him so much more!” Actually, we need Him every bit as much too! We just have other things and other people we Prefer to Depend on instead. So our lives are smaller because our view of God is smaller! We don’t Depend on Him Desperately for each day’s needs, choices, strength, and answers. Even though He has already said, “Call to me and I will answer you. I’ll tell you marvelous and wondrous things you could never figure out on your own.” (Jeremiah 33:3 MSG). And what I absolutely love about this text is that I’m not left to my own limited mind to figure stuff out! All I have to do is depend on God enough to call out to Him, and He’s waiting to answer, even me! Truthfully, we’ve all had moments when we’ve called out to people for help and clarity, and we ended up worse off. But not with God. It’s like He’s sitting on His throne with the phone in His lap just waiting for it to ring! (Don’t laugh!) And yet with such a tremendous invitation, do we ever accept? Nope! We’d rather talk to everybody except God, and then when that doesn’t work, we use Him as our last resort. Family, this should not be! It’s time we stopped talking to people, and started praying to God! 

Prayer is our Language of Dependency! Therefore, you can pretty much tell how Dependent you are on God by how often you feel the need to cry out to Him in Prayer! Mark 11:24, “For this reason I am telling you, whatever things you ask for in prayer [in accordance with God’s will], believe [with confident trust] that you have received them, and they will be given to you.” (AMP) God is waiting to give us what we pray for, yet, we haven’t become dependent enough on Him to pray! Saints, God is waiting for us to come to Him as His children dependent on their Father to care for them. So, what are we waiting for? What’s holding us up? 

Please understand that there is so much more waiting for you if you’ll only learn how powerful it is to recognize your powerlessness before God! Each new morning, in the Presence of Almighty God, you need to sign again – Your Declaration of DEPENDENCE on your King! That Declaration alone makes all the Difference! For the Believer, We Will Look at July 4th as a Holiday, HOWEVER, if anyone asks what Holiday it is For the Believer, tell them you’re simply “Celebrating DEPENDENCE Day!” I promise you it will be a tremendous witnessing tool, after all, who will pass up the opportunity for you to explain what that means?!

Remember our opening text: Isaiah 30:15-17, “God, the Master, The Holy of Israel, has this solemn counsel: “Your salvation requires you to turn back to Me and stop your silly efforts to save yourselves. Your strength will come from settling down in complete DEPENDENCE ON ME—The very thing you’ve been unwilling to do” (MSG)

Today, Shift from Being the Person Who’s Unwilling to Depend On God, to the One Willing to Depend On God! Your Dependence On God is Your Strength!

“Depending on God isn’t a weakness, it’s acknowledging His strength.” (Author Unknown)

“I am grateful for every adversity, I learn to depend more on God.” (Lailah Gifty Akita)

“Life as a Christ follower will always be a learning process of depending less on our own strength and more on God’s power.” (Lysa TerKeurst)

“There is no other method of living piously and justly, than that of depending upon God.” (John Calvin)

“If you are worshipping God without depending on the Spirit of God, you are serving a god you do not know.” (T.B. Joshua)

“Trust God, not people. Depend on God, not yourself. Live for God, not this world. God over everything.” (Trent Shelton)

“I may not be able to always depend on people, but I know I can depend on God.”

“Focus on God, not your problem. Listen to God, not your insecurities. Rely on God, not your own strength.”

“Pray as though everything depended on God. Work as though everything depended on you.” (Saint Augustine)

“Don’t depend on God to give you strength, depend on God to BE your strength.” (Pastor John Hagee)

“To pray is to accept that we are, and always will be, wholly dependent on God for everything.” (Tim Keller)

“God’s plan for your life is not dependent on the past, His plan is dependent on His promise.”

“Relying on God has to begin all over again everyday as if nothing had yet been done.” (C.S. Lewis)

“God wants us to be totally dependent on Him, and suffering seems to bring us to that point.” (Joyce Meyer)

“You may forget that you are at every moment totally dependent on God.” (C.S. Lewis)

“Having the reality of God’s presence is not dependent on our being in a particular circumstance or place, but is only dependent on our determination to keep the Lord before us continually.” (Oswald Chambers)

“We are dependent on God’s power through every step of our redemption.” (Jonathan Edwards)

“My imperfections will never override God’s promises. God’s promises are not dependent on my ability to always choose well, but rather on His ability to use well.” (Lysa TerKeurst)

“God has created us to be dependent upon Him, to bring Him our challenges and allow Him to help us with them.” (Joyce Meyer)

“Prayer is a declaration of dependence upon God.” (Philip Yancey)

Much Love, Dr. Shermaine #EnjoyTheRead #BeInspired #BeEncouraged #BeEmpowered #BeChallenged #ShareTheWord

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“ARE YOU FOLLOWING THE RIGHT LEADER?”

John 3:30, “He must increase [in prominence], but I must decrease.” (AMP); The Message Bible reads like this: “This is the assigned moment for Him to move into the center, while I slip off to the sidelines.” (MSG)

I am definitely one of those people that has to check and double-check everything I buy at the supermarket. Especially when it comes to dairy, meats, fresh fruit and vegetables. After all, when you’re raised in a house of two great cooks as parents, you come to believe that there really is an art to shopping for food. Some may not know any better, but truth is you can’t just grab the first apple or tomato you see! You have to learn to smell and squeeze the produce. And where did I get that from? My mom. She taught me how to do that as well as the importance of doing that. She taught me that you have to learn how to check for holes and dents in apples and peaches; you don’t just take the first one off the pile. You have to check to see how yellow those bananas are, or how green, or how black. In other words, there are ways to tell whether a fruit or vegetable is one you should buy. However, it’s much tougher to shop for a spiritual leader that’s a good one you can trust. Oh, but there is a way to tell!

Now if we are to be brutally honest, it’s getting tougher and tougher to know which spiritual leaders you can actually trust. After all, we’re living in a time when a lot of Christian heroes have let us down, right? People who say spiritual things, lead spiritual causes, give spiritual counsel, and then all of a sudden something happens that exposes their fleshy hypocrisy. In a way, it kind of makes a lot of us hold back and wonder who can we trust to govern, keep and protect our soul and that of our families?

Now, another truth we need to keep in mind is this, we’re not supposed to have our eyes on man in the first place! Jeremiah 17:5-6, “God’s Message: “Cursed is the strong one who depends on mere humans, Who thinks he can make it on muscle alone and sets God aside as dead weight. He’s like a tumbleweed on the prairie, out of touch with the good earth. He lives rootless and aimless in a land where nothing grows.” (MSG). Surely you don’t want that to be your testimony!

The Bible makes it clear that our focus should never be on flesh! 1 Samuel 16:7, “But God told Samuel, “Looks aren’t everything. Don’t be impressed with his looks and stature. I’ve already eliminated him. God judges persons differently than humans do. Men and women look at the face; God looks into the heart.” (MSG). That word ‘eliminate’ is defined as: ‘to completely remove or get rid of; to reject or exclude from consideration or further participation.’ Its Latin Origin ‘eliminare’ literally means ‘to turn out of doors.’ You see, this man wasn’t just rejected, but he was completely removed, God got rid of him, He made sure he was excluded from any consideration or participation; he was in essence kicked out his own house, turned outdoors! Therefore, if God doesn’t entertain ‘flesh; looks and stature’, why should we?

So, our focus on spiritual leadership shouldn’t be on the flesh, but on the spirit! God does give His people leadership; He does raise up leadership for the benefit of the Body of Christ. Ephesians 4:11-13, “And [His gifts to the church were varied and] He Himself appointed some as apostles [special messengers, representatives], some as prophets [who speak a new message from God to the people], some as evangelists [who spread the good news of salvation], and some as pastors and teachers [to shepherd and guide and instruct],  [and He did this] to fully equip and perfect the saints (God’s people) for works of service, to build up the body of Christ [the church];  until we all reach oneness in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God, [growing spiritually] to become a mature believer, reaching to the measure of the fullness of Christ [manifesting His spiritual completeness and exercising our spiritual gifts in unity].” (MSG)

In other words, there are authentic spiritual leaders who are doing their job. God does want us to be able to get His teachings and see His love coming through people, but so many have let us down. How can you tell whether a pastor is a leader from God or a person who’s simply doing his own thing in God’s name?

Well, there’s one person that Jesus really held up as a model leader. It was John the Baptist. He said, “There has been no greater man born among women.” (Matthew 11:11) Now I cannot think of a stronger endorsement than that. Jesus said John the Baptist was the real deal; a real spiritual leader, worthy of following. And why was John the Baptist an ideal leader? In John 3:30, speaking of Jesus, John said this, “He must become greater; I must become less.” The King James Version says, “He must increase; I must decrease.” 2 other translations read like this:

“Jesus must become more important, while I become less important.” (CEV);

“He must increase in importance, while I must decrease in importance.” (GWT);

You know how to test a spiritual leader? Well, one of the tests is this: Does he/she leave you thinking more about him/her or more about Jesus? Where is the spotlight focusing most and shining brightest, on him/herself, or God? Is it more about his organization, his goals, his ministry, his programs, or more about Jesus and the Great Commission He assigned for us to fulfill? An authentic man or woman of God, like John the Baptist, puts himself or herself in the background, on the sidelines, making sure that JESUS is the one who’s made to be Greater and More Important, in the very center. However, the leader doing his own thing is heavy on sentences that have: “I”, “me”, and “mine” in them, but rarely, “HIM”.

Is this the only test? No, but it’s a pretty good start. If you’re in leadership, measure yourself that way. Who is getting the attention, you the leader or the Savior? The real spiritual leaders, the ones you can trust, are the ones who put Jesus in the spotlight and make you think about Him and forget about them. They’re not seeking accolades and applause and amen’s. They don’t need their names called for everything, anything and nothing. They don’t need their picture posted on every wall nor do they need their name written on every piece of paper. They don’t need a chair the size of the Throne of God. Their main focus is that you focus mainly on Jesus! If that’s not the type of leader you are under, get out now!

Years ago I read about a man who maybe a hundred years ago had lived in the countryside in England. He traveled to London and wrote to his wife and said, “Honey, today I went to two of the great churches of London. This morning I heard Dr. Cartwright and he is a great preacher. Tonight I went to Metropolitan Tabernacle and I heard Mr. Charles Spurgeon.” He said, “Mr. Spurgeon has a great Savior.” Leaders, after you’re done speaking, teaching or preaching, do you want them to remember a great preacher, or do you leave them thinking about a great Savior? I never like to leave a church or service feeling like I was just greatly entertained by an outstanding cast of performers. I don’t want to remember the songs, the dances, the praise breaks, the garments, the titles, the beauty of the sanctuary. But what I want to leave with is conviction that I can be a better believer than I have been. It’s rare these days that I actually hear sermons that speak on holiness, sanctification, repentance, sin, hell, consequences of bad choices, or even chastisement. Instead, messages focus more on houses, cars, land, spouses, promotions, increase, harvest, blessings, abundance, and the like. But what happened to using the Word to do what it was originally designed to do? And what’s that you ask? Well, 2 Timothy informs us:

2 Timothy 3:14-17, “But as for you, continue in the things that you have learned and of which you are convinced [holding tightly to the truths], knowing from whom you learned them, and how from childhood you have known the sacred writings (Hebrew Scriptures) which are able to give you the wisdom that leads to salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus [surrendering your entire self to Him and having absolute confidence in His wisdom, power and goodness].  All Scripture is God-breathed [given by divine inspiration] and is profitable for instruction, for conviction [of sin], for correction [of error and restoration to obedience], for training in righteousness [learning to live in conformity to God’s will, both publicly and privately—behaving honorably with personal integrity and moral courage]; so that the man of God may be complete and proficient, outfitted and thoroughly equipped for every good work.” (AMP)

The Message Bible says it like this: “But don’t let it faze you. Stick with what you learned and believed, sure of the integrity of your teachers—why, you took in the sacred Scriptures with your mother’s milk! There’s nothing like the written Word of God for showing you the way to salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. Every part of Scripture is God-breathed and useful one way or another—showing us truth, exposing our rebellion, correcting our mistakes, training us to live God’s way. Through the Word we are put together and shaped up for the tasks God has for us.” (MSG)

For some reason I don’t think the Word is being preached or taught in this manner anymore. Because everyone is happy, over-joyed and excited to leave church when the Word is done. However, the Word says when the Word comes forth it will “instruct, convict, correct, train, and expose” So if that’s how the Word is coming forth, why are we so happy after every sermon, every week? We should leave after the Word feeling as though we’ve received instructions since we’ve been convicted and corrected of wrongs, and now we’re being trained to be better since our worst has been exposed. We should leave with pad and pen in hand and a list of what we need to make our own lives better.

Now, I certainly don’t believe you should spend Sunday after Sunday being busted upside the head with the Bible. But shouldn’t something be said week after week that makes you better week after week? And not “feel” better, but “be and do better.” There is indeed a difference.

Maybe you’ve been burned by Christians, by a Christian leader, many of us have. I’ve certainly had the experience of being hurt by spiritual leadership. But don’t let them cause you to miss Jesus in the midst of it all. Sometimes I think we get so lost in “Following Them”, that we forget Jesus said, “Follow Me.” Does that mean we ignore spiritual leadership? Absolutely not! Romans 13:1-7, “Every person must obey the leaders of the land. There is no power given but from God, and all leaders are allowed by God. The person who does not obey the leaders of the land is working against what God has done. Anyone who does that will be punished. Those who do right do not have to be afraid of the leaders. Those who do wrong are afraid of them. Do you want to be free from fear of them? Then do what is right. You will be respected instead. Leaders are God’s servants to help you. If you do wrong, you should be afraid. They have the power to punish you. They work for God. They do what God wants done to those who do wrong. You must obey the leaders of the land, not only to keep from God’s anger, but so your own heart will have peace.  It is right for you to pay taxes because the leaders of the land are servants for God who care for these things.  Pay taxes to whom taxes are to be paid. Be afraid of those you should fear. Respect those you should respect.” (NLV);

Hebrews 13:17, “Be responsive to your pastoral leaders. Listen to their counsel. They are alert to the condition of your lives and work under the strict supervision of God. Contribute to the joy of their leadership, not its drudgery. Why would you want to make things harder for them?” (MSG).

In other words, leadership be it in the church or in the land is to be respected. Now, you don’t have much say so in the leaders of the land, but you have a lot of say so under which leader you submit to in any given church. You are not their by force but by choice, so choose your place of worship wisely. Don’t make a selection as though it were an arena, museum, palace, stage or theater. But ask God for godly wisdom that you make the right choice to serve in the right house of worship under the right leader.

And what are some signs that you have the right leader? Just listen to Scripture:

Matthew 17:6-8, “When the disciples heard it, they fell flat on their faces, scared to death. But Jesus came over and touched them. “Don’t be afraid.” When they opened their eyes and looked around all they saw was Jesus, only Jesus.” (MSG) You need to be submitted under a leader that makes you see Only Jesus. Not them, their accomplishments, titles, positions, vestments, rings, robes, initials, degrees, collars, etc…But Only Jesus!

1 Corinthians 2:2, “You’ll remember, friends, that when I first came to you to let you in on God’s master stroke, I didn’t try to impress you with polished speeches and the latest philosophy. I deliberately kept it plain and simple: first Jesus and who he is; then Jesus and what he did—Jesus crucified.” (MSG) You need to be submitted under a leader whose preaching and teaching is about who Jesus is and what Jesus did. Not who they are (or think they are) not on what they’ve done (or think they’ve done). But a leader who keeps the name of Jesus on his/her lips when preaching or teaching. Not someone using Greek, Latin, and Hebrew in every other sentence, and certainly not someone who you need to keep the Webster’s Dictionary on hand every other 2 lines to know what 23 letter words they keep using every 5 minutes to be verbally impressive! A good leader keeps it “plain and simple.” And to those of my preacher friends who stand flat foot and preach and teach the ‘plain and simple’ Gospel, without hoop and holler, please do not compare yourselves to those who do. A hoop and holler are not the equivalent or evidence of the Holy Ghost, it is but a person’s preferred style of execution. It’s apart of their personality in how they choose to deliver. So, never feel as though you are not making the same, or even a greater impact on the lives of your hearers, just because your delivery is packaged differently. You don’t have to yell, scream, sweat, do back-flips, bang the podium, spin around in circles with fancy footwork, flying hands and spit spreading everywhere. You can still, speak what God gave you and go sit down without breaking a sweat, and still watch souls be added to the Kingdom of God. Remember, whatever your ‘preferred style’, the importance is on the Message being delivered in its most plain and simple form. Look at it like this: If a person who’s diabetic has their glucose levels shoot up through the roof, do you really think at a time like that, they want someone to hand them a pen of insulin and teach a 2 hour, detailed tutorial on the history of insulin, before they use it? No, they need a straight shot! Stick pen now! And truthfully there are a lot of people coming to our churches that are leaving empty because we’ve over-complicated the message. You can’t properly apply what you don’t clearly understand. Therefore, I reiterate, what your ‘preferred style’ is, for the sake of the people’s soul and eternity, keep it ‘plain and simple.’

Galatians 1:10-12, “Do you think I speak this strongly in order to manipulate crowds? Or curry favor with God? Or get popular applause? If my goal was popularity, I wouldn’t bother being Christ’s slave. Know this—I am most emphatic here, friends—this great Message I delivered to you is not mere human optimism. I didn’t receive it through the traditions, and I wasn’t taught it in some school. I got it straight from God, received the Message directly from Jesus Christ.” (MSG) You need to be submitted to a leader that is void of intimidation and manipulation. A leader that doesn’t need and seek applause and popularity. A leader that doesn’t attempt to impress with 9 titles and 14 initials (half of which were bought, not earned). A leader that hears from God and speaks the unadulterated Word of God to His people. A leader who is not into people pleasing, is sure to help you grow to your full potential.

Colossians 3:23-25, “Servants, do what you’re told by your earthly masters. And don’t just do the minimum that will get you by. Do your best. Work from the heart for your real Master, for God, confident that you’ll get paid in full when you come into your inheritance. Keep in mind always that the ultimate Master you’re serving is Christ. The sullen servant who does shoddy work will be held responsible. Being a follower of Jesus doesn’t cover up bad work.” (MSG) You need to be submitted to a leader that knows who the real Master is (and that it clearly is not them). Working in the church they pastor, still means you are working for God! Avoid leaders who make you feel as though you work personally for them. The work of the ministry has nothing to do with mere man. The work of the ministry is adding souls to the Kingdom. And even in this work, we are to put forth our best effort, remembering WHO it is we’re working for. Avoid leaders who act as though the Church is their personal incorporation. A leader of humility and servanthood is who you sit under submissively. A leader that does his/her best which brings out the very same in you! That’s the leader you follow.

2 Timothy 4:3-4, “You’re going to find that there will be times when people will have no stomach for solid teaching, but will fill up on spiritual junk food—catchy opinions that tickle their fancy. They’ll turn their backs on truth and chase mirages. But you—keep your eye on what you’re doing; accept the hard times along with the good; keep the Message alive; do a thorough job as God’s servant.” (MSG) You need to be submitted to a leader that will feed you the unadulterated Word of God. I love the word “unadulterated” because it’s simply defined as “having no inferior added substance.” In other words, you need a leader that will call it “Adultery”, not “An Affair”; “Sin” and not “An Issue”. You need a leader that possesses the wisdom of when to cover you and when to expose you. You need the bread of life, not a cake of compromise. A leader that will tell you when you’re wrong, not help you try to justify it as right. You need a leader that will continue to serve you the Solid Meat of the Word even when your flesh only wants to Digest Spiritual Junk Food!

Galatians 2:19-21, “What actually took place is this: I tried keeping rules and working my head off to please God, and it didn’t work. So I quit being a “law man” so that I could be God’s man. Christ’s life showed me how, and enabled me to do it. I identified myself completely with him. Indeed, I have been crucified with Christ. My ego is no longer central. It is no longer important that I appear righteous before you or have your good opinion, and I am no longer driven to impress God. Christ lives in me. The life you see me living is not “mine,” but it is lived by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. I am not going to go back on that. Is it not clear to you that to go back to that old rule-keeping, peer-pleasing religion would be an abandonment of everything personal and free in my relationship with God? I refuse to do that, to repudiate God’s grace. If a living relationship with God could come by rule-keeping, then Christ died unnecessarily.” (MSG) You need a leader just like that!

If you see a leader who leaves you thinking about Jesus, in the crowded spiritual supermarket that you and I shop in, you’ll know that’s one worth buying into. So, after this little lesson, it is my prayer that you will carefully, thoroughly, honestly re-evaluate your spiritual leadership. Make sure you are in the right house with the right head. The loss of your soul is too costly!

Remember our opening text:

John 3:30, “He must increase [in prominence], but I must decrease.”; (AMP);

“This is the assigned moment for Him to move into the center, while I slip off to the sidelines.” (MSG);

“Jesus must become more important, while I become less important.” (CEV);

“He must increase in importance, while I must decrease in importance.” (GWT).

There are many things you can use to measure good leadership, but why not follow the ruler Jesus Himself used? He used John the Baptist because He wasn’t out to compete with Him, he was out to make Jesus the most prominent; the center; and the most important, even if that meant he was to decrease; slip off to the sidelines and become less important. If you dare find a leader like that, follow him/her closely, you’ve indeed found the right one!

Charles H. Spurgeon Quotes:

“A time will come when instead of shepherds feeding the sheep, the church will have clowns entertaining the goats.”

“That very church which the world likes best is sure to be that which God abhors.”

“Satan, he can make men dance upon the brink of hell as though they were on the verge of heaven.”

“I believe that one reason why the Church of God at this present moment has so little influence over the world is because the world has so much influence over the Church.”

“The preaching of Christ is the whip that flogs the devil. The preaching of Christ is the thunderbolt, the sound of which makes hell shake.”

“The Word of God is like a Lion. You don’t have to defend a lion. All you have to do is let the lion loose and the lion will defend itself”

“Visit many good books, but live in the Bible”

“If you are idle in Christ’s work, you are active in the devil’s work”

“If sinners be damned at least let them leap to hell over our dead bodies. And if they perish, let them perish with our arms wrapped around their knees. If hell must be filled, let it be filled in the teeth of our exertions, and let no one go unwarned or unprayed for.”

“People, like sheep, tend to follow a leader – occasionally in the right direction.” (Alexander Chase)

“According to Scripture, virtually everything that truly qualifies a person for leadership is directly related to character.” (John MacArthur)

“Leadership is unlocking people’s potential to become better.” (Bill Bradley)

“Leaders don’t create followers, they create more leaders.” (Tom Peters)

“A man who wants to lead the orchestra must turn his back on the crowd.” (Max Lucado)

“Leadership is not about titles, positions or flowcharts. It is about one life influencing another.” (John C. Maxwell)

“To become a leader worth following, you must give time and attention to the inner man. To leave a legacy that goes beyond accomplishments alone, a leader must devote himself to matters of the heart.” (Andy Stanley)

“Christian leadership is a privilege of being in the service of influencing God’s people to achieve divine vision and purpose.” (Tionge Matela Msiska)

“Most Christian leadership is exercised by people who do not know how to develop healthy, intimate relationships and have opted for power and control instead. Many Christian empire-builders have been people unable to give and receive love.” (Henri Nouwen)

“A leader is one who sees more than others see, who sees farther than others see, and who sees before others see.” (Leroy Eims)

“Leadership is not about positions and having people bow to you. It’s not about having titles conferred on you. Leadership is about service. It is about helping people fulfill their God-given purpose.” (Pastor Mensa Otabil)

“To keep the wrong leader in the wrong place prevents the right leader from being in the right place.” (Aubrey Malphurs)

“Hold yourself responsible for a higher standard than anybody expects of you. Never excuse yourself.” (Author Unknown)

“Those of us who have been privileged to receive education, skills and experiences and even power must be role models for the next generation of leadership.” (Wangar Maathai)

“Leadership is all about people. It is not about organizations. It is not about plans. It is not about strategies. It is all about people-motivating people to get the job done. You have to be people-centered.” (Colin Powell)

“Your gifts are not about you; leadership is not about you; your purpose is not about you. A life of significance is about serving those who need your gifts, your leadership, your purpose.” (Kevin Hall)

“A big part of leadership is recognizing that your fruit often grows on other people’s trees.” (Todd Adkins)

“True leadership is the authority given by the trust of the followers to use power for the benefit of all.” (Dr. Myles Munroe)

“Every local church has a leader, but it seems so few local churches are being led.” (Andy Stanley)

“Leadership in church is one of the biggest challenges that the church is facing because without strong leadership, the church rarely lives out its redemptive potentials.” (Bill Hybels)

“Spiritual leadership is knowing where God wants people to to be and taking the initiative to get them there by God’s means in reliance on God’s power.” (John Piper)

“Leaders must be close enough to relate to others, but far enough ahead to motivate them.” (John Maxwell)

“The art of communication is the language of leadership.” (James C. Humes)

“The true test of leadership is how well you function in a crisis.” (Brian Tracy)

“The story of the church, as depicted in the book of Acts, is one of a community of faith directed by a team of leaders working together toward a common vision. Had the church relied upon a single, incredibly gifted, magnetic individual to replace Jesus, the church would surely have collapsed.” (George Barna)

“Integrity is the most valuable and respected quality of leadership. Always keep your word.” (Brian Tracy)

“If serving is below you, leadership is beyond you.” (Bishop Dale C. Bronner)

Much Love, Dr. Shermaine #EnjoyTheRead #BeInspired #BeEncouraged #BeEmpowered #BeChallenged #ShareTheWord

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“A PLACE WHERE WOUNDED MEN CAN BLEED AND HEAL”

Matthew 26:38, “and He said to them, “I am so sad that I feel as if I am dying. Stay here and keep awake with Me.” (CEV)

One thing for sure, I grew up with a very “man’s man” type of father. My dad was a Louisiana born mechanic, and was always covered from head to toe in grease! It drove my mother absolutely insane! In fact, when she would do the laundry, she always made sure dad’s clothes had their very own machines, his stuff didn’t mix with anybody else’s! Dad had grease under his fingernails, on his skin, dripping from his hair, covering his face and drenched in his clothes. You would often find him with a cigarette in his mouth, one hand under the hood of a car while the other hand held an ice cold beer (no matter what the weather was). He loved to hang out with his boys, he loved westerns, boxing, football and baseball. And his absolute first love was fishing! He would have about 2-3 hours sleep (which is where I get my bad habit of not sleeping enough from), and yet he would make a cup of coffee (that was half wild irish rose – don’t ask), he would chop wood for the fireplace, start a fire, walk the dog, and sit on the front stoop, all by 4am, for no other reason than that he was wide awake! Dad had a pretty nice gun collection too, and would shoot at anything that moved in the trees! In other words, dad was indeed the epitome of a “man’s man”.

However, my dad passed away in 2008 at the tender age of 75 years old. I was 36 years old when my dad passed and yet in all those years I spent with him, I only remember seeing my dad cry once. And that was when his father (my granddad) passed away when I was 5. It is the only time I can recall seeing my dad cry. He didn’t even cry on my wedding day as they wheeled him down the aisle (his way of still being able to ‘walk’ me down the aisle.) Nope, instead dad smiled and laughed the entire day! So, even though he was a “man’s man”, looking back now, I wonder did he ever cry more than that one time? I know he battled many health issues, and loss of family, and struggles working 3 jobs to support us all. But still, I can’t seem to recall more tears than that one day. And surely with such a rough life of being born in 1933, in the South as a black man who had to drop out of school before he was 9 to pick cotton, he must have had some hurtful experiences, he must’ve been wounded enough to bleed and cry, but I still wonder if he ever did.

Now, my dad isn’t the only man like that. I have a family who is largely military, and largely southern, therefore, all the men are “men’s men”! I don’t recall many of the men in my family as criers, or those who displayed their weaknesses or emotions. And I guess that’s somewhat to be expected when most men are largely reared to be brave, courageous, strong, hunters, go-getters, powerful, invincible! And those are wonderful traits, but when you’ve been counseling as long as I have, you come to find out, some of those ideal traits, are really entrapments for most men. For example, I had one couple that had been trying for 10 years to conceive and then they finally do. We get to the birth date, and mom is crying her eyes out (I’m sure from pain as well as great expectation); however, dad, was a blank face. She was angry that he didn’t gush and cry and get all soppy, and he said “I wasn’t raised that way. In my family, men don’t cry, no matter what.” She said he was like that on their wedding day and other important family events where you would expect someone to get all “blubbery” with joy! But like he said, most men, “aren’t raised that way. Men don’t cry, no matter what.”

Which is what I want to address today.

Suicide. It usually stuns those close to it. In fact, Hollywood has seen several spikes in suicides in the past few years. A director that leaped from a bridge. Actors battling drugs and alcohol that had beaten the addiction. And others that were still battling until the addiction won. Families left crushed. Many people left asking that question that often defies an answer, “Why?” Well, truth is, we may never know. As for myself, I attempted suicide on 3 occasions, all between the ages of 15-25. I battled depression severely for many years. However, my parents didn’t know that until my first suicide attempt at age 15. And even to this day, when I do suicide counseling and share my own battle scars from depression and suicide, one of the questions I’m always asked is, “what made you want to end your life? What could’ve possibly been so bad?” And again, to this day, I’m uncertain how to really answer that. Because the things that seemed so “tragic” then, looking back now, seem so unimportant. But when you’re in the moment, it’s amazing how big of a mountain a molehill can appear to be.

So, suicide has been running rampant, both in the world and in the church.

And then there was that prominent official in the White House some years ago who committed suicide. A national news magazine turned the spotlight on a disturbing fact about too many men. They are, (And I’ve never forgotten these words) “wounded men with no place to bleed.“

I know from years of walking through crisis with many men through counseling, that men often “stuff it” rather than “share it”. They live with the lie that being strong means never showing weakness, never showing a soft or hurting heart, and always being in control.

So they bleed inside where there’s nothing to stop the bleeding or treat the wound. And what’s scary is, much like a person physically bleeding on the outside (where you can see it, and notice it, and bring it to their attention, and get them some help); however when someone is bleeding internally, you don’t see it, you don’t notice it, you can’t bring it to their attention and get them some help, until it starts to reveal itself in some form of sign from the inside…out. And most men spiritually, emotionally, socially, mentally, bleed internally. But that much pressure, continuously pressed down, builds like lava in a volcano. Or like a beach ball pushed farther and farther under the water. The farther down you push it, the higher it ultimately goes when it can’t be held down any longer. Then suddenly, often inexplicably, there’s an explosion of anger or violence or depression, or self-destruction.

BUT the strongest man who ever lived offers men a better way!

The shortest verse in the Bible – only two words, John 11:35, “Jesus wept” at a friend’s grave. The Bible says, when He saw a crowd of hurting people, “He was moved with compassion because they were…like sheep without a shepherd” (Matthew 9:36).

I’ve come to find out that Jesus expressed quite a few emotions that men today need to learn to feel free in expressing:

“for days, being tempted by the devil. And He ate nothing during those days, and when they ended, HE WAS HUNGRY.” (Luke 4:2 AMP)

“But Jesus was in the stern, ASLEEP [with His head] on the [sailor’s leather] cushion…” (Mark 4:38 AMP)

“Looking at him, Jesus FELT A LOVE (HIGH REGARD, COMPASSION) FOR HIM…” (Mark 10:21 AMP)

“Now Jesus LOVED AND WAS CONCERNED about Martha and her sister and Lazarus [and considered them dear friends]” (John 11:5 AMP)

“In that very hour He was OVERJOYED AND REJOICED GREATLY…” (Luke 10:21 AMP)

“After looking around at them WITH ANGER, GRIEVED…” (Mark 3:5 AMP)

“Now when Jesus heard this, HE WAS AMAZED…” (Luke 7:9 AMP)

“…He began to be DEEPLY DISTRESSED AND TROUBLED [EXTREMELY ANGUISHED at the prospect of what was to come].” (Mark 14:33 AMP)

“As He approached Jerusalem, He saw the city and WEPT OVER IT [and the spiritual ignorance of its people]” (Luke 19:41 AMP)

“and looking up to heaven, HE SIGHED DEEPLY…” (Mark 7:34 AMP)

“He GROANED AND SIGHED DEEPLY IN HIS SPIRIT…” (Mark 8:12 AMP)

“But when Jesus saw this, HE WAS INDIGNANT…” (Mark 10:14 AMP)

“Jesus STERNLY WARNED them…” (Mark 3:12 AMP)

“When Jesus saw her sobbing, and the Jews who had come with her also sobbing, HE WAS DEEPLY MOVED IN SPIRIT [TO THE POINT OF ANGER at the sorrow caused by death] AND WAS TROUBLED.” (John 11:33 AMP)

“But Jesus would often go to some place where HE COULD BE ALONE and pray.” (Luke 5:16 CEV)

Men of God, did you pay attention to all the varying emotions that Jesus Himself expressed? Not suppressed, not kept hidden, not masked, not covered, not lied about, not pretending, not making excuses for, but one He Unapologetically Expressed. And not in a secluded spot, but He did so in front of others! And if the Son of God can express His emotions, and we are to follow in His footsteps, for He is our example, then why would you deny yourself the relief of release? After all, Jesus Himself was: Hungry, Sleepy, Moved With Compassion, Felt Love, Was Concerned, Was Overjoyed and Rejoiced, Was Angry, Grieved, Amazed, Distressed, Troubled, Groaned and Sighed Deeply, Was Indignant, Gave Stern Warnings, Was Angry and Alone. So, why are YOU internally bleeding due to the lack of expressed emotions?

Jesus wasn’t afraid to let His friends know He was really hurting. Just before what He knew was going to be His awful torture and crucifixion, He asked His main guys to be with Him in the garden. He told them, “My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with Me” (Matthew 26:38). Though He was God in the flesh – the Ultimate Man – He wasn’t afraid to say He needed people. Yet, you my brothers, are acting so fiercely brave, because you’re afraid someone will see the flaw in your character, that you aren’t always as tough as the role you play. But you need not hide anymore, pretend anymore, camouflage anymore. As Wounded As You Are, You Have a Place to Bleed, Heal, and Recover!

Your Safe Place to Bleed is With the One Who Bled For You!

Hebrews 4:15-16, “Now that we know what we have—Jesus, this great High Priest with ready access to God—let’s not let it slip through our fingers. We don’t have a priest who is out of touch with our reality. He’s been through weakness and testing, experienced it all—all but the sin. So let’s walk right up to him and get what he is so ready to give. Take the mercy, accept the help.” (MSG)

You got it! Wounded soldier, you have a place to bleed! It’s in the Presence of your Savior. It’s your safe place to unload, to be naked and not ashamed, to reveal, expose, and tell all. You don’t have to hide, cover, mask, pretend, find the right words, go at a particular hour, He’s always waiting, and always available. He wants you to come to Him and find your sheltered place for rest, relief and release. Therefore, obey the Scripture, “…walk right up to him and get what he is so ready to give. Take the mercy, accept the help.”

Matthew 11:28-30, “Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. KEEP COMPANY WITH ME and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.” (MSG) Did you catch that? Jesus Himself has extended a private invitation to you, for you to go away “and keep company with Him.” So, what are you waiting for? Are you waiting like the lava in a volcano to finally explode?! Because that’s the worst thing you can do, and here’s why. Have you ever paid attention to when a volcano erupts? The lava is no respect of person! Whoever comes into contact with it, perishes! And if you continue to suppress your emotions, you will erupt and your anger will come in contact with all those attached to you and burn up your friendships, covenants, relationships, family ties, businesses, churches, ministries, neighbors…everyone that comes in contact with you will burn to ashes! But why let that be your outcome, when you have access to a safe place to release?

Men of God, you are not so “manly” that you don’t have moments when you need to cry, to vent, to tell it, to share it, to ask for help, for advice, for direction, for wisdom, and yes even for a shoulder to cry and lean on. Unexpressed emotions are dangerous for you and everyone attached to you! Let today be the day you find relief and release by resting in the safe place of the presence of the Lord. He’s waiting to hear about the marriage that’s on life-support, about the children who have gone astray, about the finances that are drying up, about your private hurts, disappointments, and discouragements. He’s waiting to hear you tell Him what the doctor told you. He wants to hear what the lawyer said. He wants to share in your anguish over the loss of a job. He wants to hear about the dreams that have become nightmares. He wants to hear about your fears, your distrust, your doubts, unbelief and lack of faith. He wants to hear about the bills, the bankruptcy, and the burst plumbing line. He wants to hear what makes you feel insignificant, less than, and not enough. He wants you to hand over to Him your low self-esteem and damaged self-respect. He wants you to share with Him your weaknesses so He can share with you His strengths. Talk to Him, Tell Him, He Wants to Hear Your Voice, Even if it’s Shaky, Trembling and Filled With Fear!

Jeremiah 33:2-3, “This is God’s Message, the God who made earth, made it livable and lasting, known everywhere as God: ‘CALL TO ME AND I WILL ANSWER YOU. I’ll tell you marvelous and wondrous things that you could never figure out on your own.’ (MSG)

Men of God, why are you struggling alone when God Himself wants to keep company with you? He’s asking you to call HIM, not Tony, Eric, Robert, Shawn, Darryl, Kevin….No, this time, Call Jesus! Does that mean you should never reach out to your boys? Absolutely not! Even Jesus reached out to His boys and told them He was sad and in anguish and needed them to stay awake with Him. So, if Jesus reached out to His boys, you are more than encouraged to reach out to yours. However, don’t make the mistake many women make, and that is to reach out to our Sisters BEFORE reaching out to our Savior. God alone, is the place where you are guaranteed to renew and regain strength after releasing to Him your weakness.

Do not suffer in silence and die. You are needed more than you’ll ever know. You’re needed in your family, among your friends and coworkers, you’re needed in the church, in the community and in the Kingdom. We need your gifts, your anointing, your skills, your talent. We need your presence. Which is why we need you to take your broken pieces to Jesus so that you can be made whole, because there is a host of other men, wounded with nowhere to bleed, that are waiting for someone just like you to help them put their fragmented emotions back together again. We need you to overcome, because we need your testimony. You are the product of what God’s power can do when you plug in to His source.

So, no more waiting for everyone to go to sleep so you can slip out unawares to breathe and sigh in the car or in the backyard. No more tears trickling down in the shower where no one can hear or see. No more ‘I’m fine; I’m okay; Everything’s good.’ No More Internal Bleeding! God has already showed you in His Word that He’s there to help, but you do know that you also have a huge family of brothers and sisters in Christ that are here for you too? Galatians 6:1-2, “Live creatively, friends. If someone falls into sin, forgivingly restore him, saving your critical comments for yourself. You might be needing forgiveness before the day’s out. Stoop down and reach out to those who are oppressed. Share their burdens, and so complete Christ’s law. If you think you are too good for that, you are badly deceived.” (MSG) We’re here to help too! Whether its sin, hurt, pain, failure, disappointment, frustration, confusion, struggles, we’re here to help! Whether it was your fault or no fault of your own, we’re here to help too! Brothers you are never alone! So stop isolating yourself and reconnect with your family! We may not all be doctors, nurses, surgeons, therapists and the like, but as believers we do specialize in love! And if love is all we have to use as a bandage, you are still on your way to healing!

1 Peter 4:7-11, “Everything in the world is about to be wrapped up, so take nothing for granted. Stay wide-awake in prayer. Most of all, love each other as if your life depended on it. Love makes up for practically anything. Be quick to give a meal to the hungry, a bed to the homeless—cheerfully. Be generous with the different things God gave you, passing them around so all get in on it: if words, let it be God’s words; if help, let it be God’s hearty help. That way, God’s bright presence will be evident in everything through Jesus, and he’ll get all the credit as the One mighty in everything—encores to the end of time. Oh, yes!” (MSG)

Brothers, You Have a Safe Place to Take Your Wounds to so They Can Bleed, Heal and Recover. His Name is Jesus, and He Has a Secured, Reserved Spot Just For You. Make Today the Day You Hide Under His Wings For Help!

Psalm 91, “You who sit down in the High God’s presence, spend the night in Shaddai’s shadow, Say this: “God, you’re my refuge. I trust in you and I’m safe!” That’s right—he rescues you from hidden traps, shields you from deadly hazards. His huge outstretched arms protect you— UNDER THEM YOU’RE PERFECTLY SAFE; his arms fend off all harm. Fear nothing—not wild wolves in the night, not flying arrows in the day, Not disease that prowls through the darkness, not disaster that erupts at high noon. Even though others succumb all around, drop like flies right and left, no harm will even graze you. You’ll stand untouched, watch it all from a distance, watch the wicked turn into corpses. Yes, because God’s your refuge, the High God your very own home, Evil can’t get close to you, harm can’t get through the door. He ordered his angels to guard you wherever you go. If you stumble, they’ll catch you; their job is to keep you from falling. You’ll walk unharmed among lions and snakes, and kick young lions and serpents from the path. “If you’ll hold on to me for dear life,” says God, “I’ll get you out of any trouble. I’ll give you the best of care if you’ll only get to know and trust me. Call me and I’ll answer, be at your side in bad times; I’ll rescue you, then throw you a party. I’ll give you a long life, give you a long drink of salvation!” (MSG)

See, men, you have the love and help of your brothers and sisters, but more importantly you have Jesus, where no matter how badly life has hurt you, He is your safe place, where you are “…PERFECTLY SAFE…”

Brothers, we need you alive and well! So no more silent internal bleeding. No matter what the feelings or emotions, no matter what the situation or circumstance, share it. You can still be a ‘man’s man’ and cry! Let no one else tell you differently. And please remember this, your wife and sisters and daughters are watching how you deal with your emotions. When you bottle them up, you teach them this is the way a man should handle his emotions. Your sons and brothers are watching how you deal with your emotions. When you hide them, cover them, mask them, pretend about them, you are showing them the example you want them to follow in how they deal with their emotions. And if you want everyone to be healthy, YOU first have to show them what healthy emotions look like. Jesus Did, and so can you. You are the head of our families, communities and churches, and the head tells the body how to function. Make sure as the head, you’re getting help, you’re healing, you’re becoming whole, so we can follow your lead and function in the same matter! Lead us well, by leading yourself first to the secret place of the Presence of God where you may be wounded, you may bleed, but you will recover!

Much Love, Dr. Shermaine #EnjoyTheRead #BeInspired #BeEncouraged #BeEmpowered #BeChallenged #ShareTheWord

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“Don’t Miss Your Mentor’s Mantle”

2 Kings 2:1-15, “Just before God took Elijah to heaven in a whirlwind, Elijah and Elisha were on a walk out of Gilgal. Elijah said to Elisha, “Stay here. God has sent me on an errand to Bethel.” Elisha said, “Not on your life! I’m not letting you out of my sight!” So they both went to Bethel. The guild of prophets at Bethel met Elisha and said, “Did you know that God is going to take your master away from you today?” “Yes,” he said, “I know it. But keep it quiet.” Then Elijah said to Elisha, “Stay here. God has sent me on an errand to Jericho.” Elisha said, “Not on your life! I’m not letting you out of my sight!” So they both went to Jericho. The guild of prophets at Jericho came to Elisha and said, “Did you know that God is going to take your master away from you today?” “Yes,” he said, “I know it. But keep it quiet.” Then Elijah said to Elisha, “Stay here. God has sent me on an errand to the Jordan.” Elisha said, “Not on your life! I’m not letting you out of my sight!” AND SO THE TWO OF THEM WENT THEIR WAY TOGETHER. Meanwhile, fifty men from the guild of prophets gathered some distance away while the two of them stood at the Jordan. Elijah took his cloak, rolled it up, and hit the water with it. The river divided and the two men walked through on dry land. When they reached the other side, Elijah said to Elisha, “What can I do for you before I’m taken from you? Ask anything.” Elisha said, “YOUR LIFE REPEATED IN MY LIFE. I WANT TO BE A HOLY MAN JUST LIKE YOU.” “That’s a hard one!” said Elijah. “BUT IF YOU’RE WATCHING WHEN I’M TAKEN FROM YOU, YOU’LL GET WHAT YOU’VE ASKED FOR. BUT ONLY IF YOU’RE WATCHING.” And so it happened. They were walking along and talking. Suddenly a chariot and horses of fire came between them and Elijah went up in a whirlwind to heaven. ELISHA SAW IT ALL and shouted, “My father, my father! You—the chariot and cavalry of Israel!” When he could no longer see anything, he grabbed his robe and ripped it to pieces. THEN HE PICKED UP ELIJAH’S CLOAK THAT HAD FALLEN FROM HIM, returned to the shore of the Jordan, and stood there. He took Elijah’s cloak—all that was left of Elijah!—and hit the river with it, saying, “Now where is the God of Elijah? Where is he?” WHEN HE STRUCK THE WATER, THE RIVER DIVIDED AND ELISHA WALKED THROUGH. The guild of prophets from Jericho saw the whole thing from where they were standing. They said, “THE SPIRIT OF ELIJAH LIVES IN ELISHA!” They welcomed and honored him.” (MSG)

Question: Where have all the Mentors gone? And since I’m a woman, let me talk from a woman’s perspective today (brothers, please don’t be offended, I’ll get back to you next week, ALTHOUGH, if you pay close attention, I’m sure you’ll still be able to glean something of encouragement from today’s devotional too).

Now, when I ask where are all the Mentors, I mean where are the older, wiser women who once taught younger women to bake bread, sew clothing and keep their kitchens spotless? Where are the women who once gathered in homes for coffee and encouragement? Where are the women who taught other women how to be good mothers, supportive wives, and holy single women? Where are the women who taught you how a godly woman ought to dress, behave and speak? Where have all the Mentors gone?

Well, truth is, they haven’t disappeared entirely. They can be found in the church, in homes, offices, neighborhoods and schools. Their focus may have changed a bit in this day and time, but they are still there for the younger women who have much to learn from them!

I often share with people that I wasn’t raised in a “Christian household”, nor was I raised in church. For some who’ve known me for the last 20 years or so, would be shocked to hear that (and I indeed count it as a humbling honor), but truth is I wasn’t on the choir, I was in the club; I wasn’t taking communion, I was taking shots at the bar; I wasn’t preaching, I was partying! 

However, when I turned 25, and was homeless with 2 children on my own with nothing more than a high school diploma and no job or money, Jesus started to look pretty good to me! Seriously! 

Well, I eventually made it to a little underground, Baptist church and if you saw what I looked like you would be amazed that the mother board didn’t attempt to take me and drown me in the baptismal pool, with or without salvation! LOL! You see, I walked in with braids down to my behind; a face full of cheap make-up amateurishly applied; a mouth worse than the worse cussing sailor on the high seas in the midst of a disastrous storm; a sheer tank top, colored bra and a skirt the size of belts I wear now (and it still had two splits on the side…LOL) Talk about a hot mess! I’m so grateful ‘selfies’ and the like were not around! However, a true fun fact is, in 1997 (the exact same year of my 25 birthday and the year I received Christ, while looking a hot mess), the first recognizable social media site, Six Degrees, was created! Talk about being grateful! God got me before social media could! LOL! THANK YOU JESUS! And people are running around thanking God for houses, cars, and jobs! I was thanking God that He called me before social media caught me! I reiterate, a Hot Mess!  

And yet, it’s the older women I remember and cherish most about my early days of salvation.  They were indeed the epitome of love, encouragement, support and help (in addition to rebuke, reprove, correction and instruction)! I will never forget a single one of them! And here’s a few reasons why:

I had one mother that said, “baby go in the bathroom and wash that makeup off your pretty face! You know how many ugly women need those products that you’re wasting on your face?” That’s Old School though, (she didn’t care two cents about how she delivered her message, nor how I felt when I received it!) LOL! I laugh now, and I certainly laughed then! And believe it or not, I went straight in that bathroom and did what mother said do!  Truth is, I loved the church mothers because at least they were too busy talking to my Face to talk behind my Back! FACTS! They were a bold Baptist bunch who were determined to make me a believer, voluntarily or involuntarily! One way or another, they were going to make me right with God no matter how wrong I was!

Another one of the mothers came up to me and explained what a “lap cloth” is and why I needed one…desperately…again, I laugh now, and I certainly laughed then! You see, mother said, “why buy the cow when they can get the milk for free? And baby you’ve already let 2 men dabble in your milk, no sense in letting them take your cheese too” LOL! Honey, I thought I would hit the floor on that one! I was like “WHAT?!” What the heck does that even mean? LOL! What does milk and cheese have to do with sex, babies and salvation?! LOL! But mother didn’t play! So, trust when I tell you, grown or not, I learned to wear my skirts covering my shoes with my legs tightly crossed and still had on a “lap scarf“! Good times I tell you the truth! Oh, I was determined to stay saved, and mother was more determined to keep me saved!

Not to mention the mothers who helped my mouth get delivered!  One mother said “ignorant women curse, intelligent women either use wise words, or utilize the strength of restraint and be quiet. Fools argue with fools, wise women know the wealth of their words (and their silence) and simply walk away”. I must admit, I cussed a few more folks out after that, but I eventually got better…a little better…LOL!

Serious Moment: I tell you, I was blessed to be surrounded by older women who invested in me. Not my gifts, ministry, anointing, calling, purpose, destiny etc…but Me…Personally! They helped me dress better, speak wiser, act appropriately, behave more becoming, and they certainly were not shy at all about calling me on the carpet about anything that reappeared from my pre-saved days! LOL!

These same women helped me to go to school, get a job, an apartment, and to raise my daughters in the admonition of the Lord. They taught me about saving money, about tithing, about dating appropriately and dating appropriate men, since I was single at the time. With that said, I’ll never forget the first time a mother said to me “not him baby, that’s a wolf in sheep’s clothing“.  Now, that may make sense to you who have been saved all your little life. But imagine someone saying that to someone not raised in church at all?! Now, I’ve heard of men being equated to dogs (‘all men are dogs’, as the saying goes), but never had I in all my days heard of a man being equated with a wolf and a sheep! And just how did the wolf shear the sheep to get its wool and make clothes out of it?! And where was all of this found in the Bible?! What exactly was the lesson I was supposed to walk away with here?! I was like, mothers what are you doing to my sanity! What in the world did dating, sex, men, sheep and wolves have to do with being saved?! LOL!!!!! I couldn’t figure out if the man was bad because he was a dangerous wolf, or bad because he was a punk sheep! Yall laugh, but church folks, you can’t use “church lingo” on everybody! If nothing else, develop a Church Dictionary and give it to unbelievers when they cross over so we all know what yall talking about! You can go ahead and laugh, by now you know I laughed then…and I’m certainly laughing now!

These same women invited me to their homes for cooking lessons and sewing lessons (and yet I still hate to sew to this day!)

And these women were smart too! I had one mother who was the mother of all mothers say, “you are so pretty with your cute little figure, now this is what you’re going to do in the church to keep your pretty little cute figure…SAVED!” Next thing I knew, I was a Missionary, Choir and Praise Team Member, Usher, and First Lady’s Assistant! LOL! Not to mention I was at church every Sunday before anybody, standing on the steps with my 2 babies waiting for Pastor to open the church house! LOL! Those were the days! Honey, those mothers had me in prayer and bible study (every Tuesday); missionary meetings (every Wednesday); usher meetings (every Thursday); rehearsals (every Friday); and Monday nights I met with one of the Sunday School Teachers, who taught me at her house how to read and understand the bible! And Saturdays were no longer party day’s, they became the day I had to study for my missionary class, usher class, Sunday School, and back then our choir had homework….literally….homework! Like, here’s the paper with the words to the song, now go home and find at least 5 scriptures to support this song being sung in church…LOL! First Lady Was Crazy! LOL!  

Those mothers/women were determined! I was a real life Christian Frankenstein project! They didn’t care how I came in there, but they certainly refused to let me stay that way! LOL!

Well, sisters, I share all of this with you because we need this kind of support and love in the church today (especially for our younger women, and our babes in Christ). We have more than enough criticism and judgments, we need those who look past all of the outer exterior and help people from the inside…out! It works, I’m a witness!

Listen, my youngest daughter Ashley, if she walked in your church today you more than likely would think she knows absolutely nothing about Jesus! She has around 30 tattoos, 20 piercings, red, green, silver, pink, purple, multicolored hair and contacts (depending on the mood of the  day), her finger nails are long and pointy, she wears open-toe sandals in winter and leather jackets in summer! Everything about her outer appearance is questionable, and I’m her mama! LOL! But little do people know she’s been in church since she was four and singing on the choir and praise teams since then as well. She’s never missed Sunday school or bible study, or prayer meetings or rehearsals, and she still had to memorize a Scripture every Sunday to stand before the congregation to recite. She worked with the youth and dancers, and at home had to do devotional service in the morning before I took them to school and at night before they went to bed. But by her outer appearance many would assume she knew nothing about Jesus and was raised in the streets! But that’s why mentors are so vitally needed in church. I didn’t have to raise her by myself, she had a whole church that became grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, godparents, and they helped her to grow into a phenomenal young woman! Still strange, but phenomenal nonetheless! LOL! She loves God and to see her get lost in praise and worship has brought this mother to tears many of days. Mentors, there are a whole lot of ‘Shermaine’s” and ‘Ashley’s’ out there that look different than you’re accustomed to for a ‘church lady‘, but she needs God and you can get her to Him, regardless of what she looks like in the process! Don’t judge, just help! Don’t criticize, just help! Don’t gossip, just help! Don’t try to make them change, just help! Many of us look quite different on the outside, but we have a David’s heart for God on the inside, don’t be the one that gets in the way of that development and growth!

Now, I was far from perfect then and now, but I promise you I would’ve easily been in a grave and had my children taken from me, had those women not stepped into my life and turn it completely upside down! I will forever be grateful for all of my awesome motherly mentors!

You see, some Mentors are much like Elijah, who was faithfully carrying on his role as God’s prophet when he saw Elisha working in his father’s fields. He saw the potential in this young man, so he threw his mantle on Elisha’s shoulders, symbolically passing the leadership to the next generation.  (1 Kings 19:19, “So Elijah left there and found Elisha son of Shaphat, whose plowing was being done with twelve yoke of oxen, and he drove the twelfth. Elijah crossed over to him and cast his mantle upon him.” AMPC) Elisha then said good-bye to his old life and moved forward, following Elijah and learning from the older man. I’m so grateful that I had mentors/women/mothers, who looked past all of my problems and still saw some potential.  Elisha was busy in the fields, but I was busy having fun. And still my Elijah’s found me, saw my potential, and they went to work to make sure that my potential produced something!

Eventually we find the prophetic pair at Bethel, the house of God. Elisha had steadfastly, faithfully and consistently stayed with his Mentor Elijah. Even when Elijah commanded Elisha to remain in Bethel, Elisha refused, saying he would never leave the older prophet’s side. You see they left Gilgal together and Elijah told him to stay put as he would go forth on his assignment. But for Elisha he followed Elijah to Bethel, to Jericho and then on to Jordan. Thus, Elisha expressed his love and faithfulness not only to Elijah, but also to God. Elisha vowed never to leave Elijah, and he didn’t until he had gleaned everything he needed to know from this godly man, until he received the blessing of his Mentor, until he watched his Mentor vanish in a heavenly whirlwind. I love the way Elisha stuck like glue to Elijah, because I certainly did the same with my mentors/mother’s! I watched everything they did; I listened to how they talked; I mimicked how they would sit as ladies, back straight and head held high with shoulders squared! I would dress as they dressed, tone down my makeup, clean up my speech, whatever they did, I did. I was determined to be better, and they were determined to make me better!

Truth is, we all need Mentors like Elijah: women who have faced challenges and overcome them; women who have grown through struggle and perseverance; women who have seen God perform miracles; women who have gone through hard times and experienced God’s presence with them. 

We all need Mentors who make us better physically, mentally, emotionally, financially, academically, socially, spiritually, etc…We All Need Mentors!

We all need Mentors/Women who can pass on the news that God’s Word is still active and dynamic among us. Those who will teach us how to pray instead of having pity parties; teach us to search the scriptures instead of seeking out a girlfriend to get bad advice from; to teach us to fast instead of fall apart over every failure! We all need Mentors to correct our speech; our dress attire; our attitude; our behavior; our laziness etc…We need Mentors to say “no honey, you not ready for marriage, motherhood or ministry” We all need Mentors!

Why? Because these are the very ones who can place the mantle on our shoulders and confirm that we’re ready to move on to greater tasks, or withhold that mantle until they know beyond a shadow of a doubt that we’ve matured enough to carry it!

Mentors, we need your insight; knowledge; understanding; wisdom; discernment; guidance; counsel; experience. We even need to know your failures, mistakes, missteps, mishaps and the like too. In essence, we need you to help us to walk around the pitfalls you fell into!

So…Who are the godly women walking along the roads in your life, willing to pass on the knowledge they’ve gained? Who has watched you as you’ve worked in your Bible study, your volunteer position or at your job? Who has seen your gifts and your potential? Who stands by waiting to knock you down a few pegs when you get arrogant, conceited, prideful and entitled; or lifts you up when you feel low? Who corrects you, rebukes you, trains you instead of just tolerating you? 

Find Your Elijah! And while you’re at it, try being like Elisha. Follow your Elijah and glean from her knowledge of the living God concerning how to best serve Him and live for Him. 

Remember Elijah’s words to Elisha, “if you see me, you’ll get from me what you asked”. Elisha Kept His Eyes On His Mentor, Stayed In Close Proximity and Obeyed Him and Thus He Received Elijah’s Mantle! But the key is, he watched his mentor! Unfortunately, too many of us are trying to be seen, that we’re not watching, and thus we’re missing the mantle! Selah…

Get a Mentor, Stay Close, Be Obedient, Remain Watchful, So You Don’t Miss Your Mantle!

“…And so it happened. They were walking along and talking. Suddenly a chariot and horses of fire came between them and Elijah went up in a whirlwind to heaven. ELISHA SAW IT ALL and shouted, “My father, my father! You—the chariot and cavalry of Israel!” When he could no longer see anything, he grabbed his robe and ripped it to pieces. THEN HE PICKED UP ELIJAH’S CLOAK THAT HAD FALLEN FROM HIM, returned to the shore of the Jordan, and stood there. He took Elijah’s cloak—all that was left of Elijah!—and hit the river with it, saying, “Now where is the God of Elijah? Where is he?” WHEN HE STRUCK THE WATER, THE RIVER DIVIDED AND ELISHA WALKED THROUGH. The guild of prophets from Jericho saw the whole thing from where they were standing. They said, “THE SPIRIT OF ELIJAH LIVES IN ELISHA!” They welcomed and honored him.” (MSG)

There will always be evidence that you are carrying your mentor’s mantle! Elisha was able to do what his mentor did, and not out of comparison or competition either! And the other prophets saw him, and their collective testimony was, “THE SPIRIT OF ELIJAH LIVES IN ELISHA!” THEY WELCOMED AND HONORED HIM.” Would people be able to say the same about you? Do they see the reflections of your mentor in your life, speech, behavior and actions? Can they see the evidence that you’ve been a good student and follower?

Remember to do as Elisha did, stay close, obey and be watchful!

Reflection Questions:

1. Who do you see as an Elijah, faithfully serving God in your community/church/life? Have you reached out to them for mentoring?
2. What do you need to do to become more available to learn from a godly Mentor?
3. Who do you trust to tell it like it is?
4. Who pat’s you on the back and simultaneously kicks you in the butt?
5. Who teaches you; trains you; instructs you?
6. Who invests time into developing and maturing you?
7. If you have a mentor, how well do you think they’re doing? How well do you think they would say you’re doing?
8. Name 1 woman who has mentored you the greatest and why?
9. What is the best mentor advice you’ve ever received?
10. In what ways could you become a Mentor to another woman?

1 Kings 19:19-21, “Elijah went straight out and found Elisha son of Shaphat in a field where there were twelve pairs of yoked oxen at work plowing; Elisha was in charge of the twelfth pair. Elijah went up to him and threw his cloak over him. Elisha deserted the oxen, ran after Elijah, and said, “Please! Let me kiss my father and mother good-bye—then I’ll follow you.” “Go ahead,” said Elijah, “but, mind you, don’t forget what I’ve just done to you.” So Elisha left; he took his yoke of oxen and butchered them. He made a fire with the plow and tackle and then boiled the meat—a true farewell meal for the family. Then he left and followed Elijah, becoming his right-hand man.” (MSG)

Titus 2:1-5, “Your job is to speak out on the things that make for solid doctrine. Guide older men into lives of temperance, dignity, and wisdom, into healthy faith, love, and endurance. Guide older women into lives of reverence so they end up as neither gossips nor drunks, but models of goodness. By looking at them, the younger women will know how to love their husbands and children, be virtuous and pure, keep a good house, be good wives. We don’t want anyone looking down on God’s Message because of their behavior. Also, guide the young men to live disciplined lives.” (MSG)

Elijah’s, Find Your Elisha’s, They Have Need of You!

Much Love, Dr. Shermaine #EnjoyTheRead #BeInspired #BeEncouraged #BeEmpowered #BeChallenged #ShareTheWordFeel free to also join us at: http://www.selfcarewithdrshermaine.blogspot.com “Checklist For Staying Healthy”

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“BUT GOD!”

1 Chronicles 28:2-3, “Then David the king rose to his feet and said, Hear me, my brethren and my people. I MYSELF INTENDED to build a house of rest for the ark of the covenant of the Lord, as a footstool for our God, and I prepared materials for the building. BUT GOD said to me, You shall not build a house for My Name [and Presence], because you have been a man of war and have shed blood” (AMP).

“…I MYSELF INTENDED…BUT GOD…”

Vincent’s passion for ministry led him to the Belgian coalfields where he preached to miners, tended the injured, fed the hungry and earned a place in the people’s hearts. His church was filled to capacity with those eager to learn about Jesus. But his superiors weren’t happy because Vincent wore cast-offs, lived in a shack and gave his salary to the people. “You look worse than the people you came to teach,” they said. “Wouldn’t Jesus have done the same?” Vincent asked. His bosses disagreed and he was dismissed from the ministry. He was hurt and angry; his only desire had been to build a church that glorified God, so why hadn’t God let it happen? Then one day he watched an old miner struggling beneath a load of coal. Moved by the sight he began to sketch the bowed figure. And although he didn’t realize it at the time, he’d discovered his Real calling. The young preacher who was rejected by his denomination eventually became an artist the world will long remember: Vincent van Gogh!

With that thought, how do you react to the “…BUT GOD…” interruptions in your life? Do you fuss and fume, or do you look for His hand in them? Understandably, Vincent was not happy at all that the one thing he desired to do, he could no longer do. Why? Because God had a different set of plans! And can you imagine what the world of art would be like without Vincent van Gogh? Can you imagine the void from his absence in artistry? There’s a quote I’ve recently come across that states: “Sometimes, the Interruption is the Assignment.” But let’s be honest, who do you know of that gets excited about interruptions? After all, its very definition states: “to stop the continuous progress of; to break the continuity of something.” Its Latin Origin ‘interrumpere’ literally means, ‘to break.’ And if it’s two things we do not like, it’s to be interrupted and to be broken! But oftentimes that’s when God does His best work in our lives. One, when we’re interrupted, because we have a tendency to be busy little beavers working on dam’s God never assigned us to build! And two, we also have a tendency to be arrogant when we have it supposedly altogether! So God interrupts and breaks us so He can get our hands on the right blueprints for building and so we can be made humble before He honors us! Saints, I encourage you to learn how to embrace both interruptions and brokenness, for in them lies God’s greatest plans, purpose and direction!

Jeremiah 29:10-11, “This is God’s Word on the subject…I’ll show up and take care of you as I promised and bring you back home. I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.” (MSG)

Proverbs 16:3, “Commit your works to the Lord [submit and trust them to Him], And your plans will succeed [if you respond to His will and guidance].” (AMP)

Our plans will always work, when they’re rightly aligned with His Plans and Purpose!

Proverbs 19:21, “Many plans are in a man’s mind, But it is the Lord’s purpose for him that will stand (be carried out).” (AMP)

Truth is, all of us will experience “…BUT GOD…” moments in life. I wanted to marry that man/woman…BUT GOD! I wanted to go to that school…BUT GOD! I wanted to accept that job…BUT GOD! I wanted to purchase that house…BUT GOD! I wanted to start that business…BUT GOD! I wanted to have a baby…BUT GOD! I wanted to start a church…BUT GOD! I wanted to relocate…BUT GOD! I wanted to throw in the towel and call it quits…BUT GOD! So, how do you handle the “…BUT GOD…” interruptions in life?

Let’s take a listen in and see if David has some advice for us: David said, “I…intended to build a…home for the ark…BUT GOD said…’ Your son Solomon…shall build My house” (1 Chronicles 28:2-6 NASB). Now, I can’t speak for you, but if I were David, I would’ve been a bit upset. Can I be truthful with you?! God, this is me, David, King David at that! I’m Your friend! I’m the Anointed One! I’m the one You sought after and declared to all that I Have a Heart After You! How can You skip over me and give this assignment to someone ‘less qualified than’ me? And for Solomon? He’s my son and all, and that’s wonderful, but he’s young and inexperienced, and You’ve never said about him the things You’ve said about me. Surely, I’m more qualified than he, surely I would make a better architect than he? Why am I, of all people receiving a “…BUT GOD…”?

However, when God nixed his plans, David didn’t respond as I may have, instead, he immediately followed his “…BUT GOD…” with a “…YET GOD…” and declared, “YET, the Lord, the God of Israel, chose me from all the house of my father to be king over Israel forever. For He has chosen Judah to be a leader; and in the house of Judah, my father’s house, and among the sons of my father He took pleasure in me to make me king over all Israel” (1 Chronicles 28:4 NASB)

You see, instead of complaining about what he DIDN’T get to do, David rejoiced in how God had ALREADY blessed him by promoting him from herding sheep to leading the Israelite nation! Amazing! But isn’t perspective and gratitude two things that can make all the difference?! It’s not about how we see it, it’s about looking at everything through God’s Perspective!

I wonder if we were asked would we be able to say we respond to our “…BUT GOD…” moments with a “…YET GOD…” declaration? Instead of murmuring and complaining, comparing and competing, David celebrates what the Lord has already granted him. Going forward, will you mature to David’s level of leadership and trust God’s plan, even when it differs from the one you intended? You see, the word ‘intended’ means ‘planned.’ Therefore, it’s not like David was sitting on his hands and just making wishes, goals, aims and hopes. When he says ‘he intended’, it means he already made plans. Listen to the text again: “…I MYSELF INTENDED to build a house of rest for the ark of the covenant of the Lord, as a footstool for our God, and I PREPARED MATERIALS FOR THE BUILDING. BUT GOD…” This wasn’t a let’s see what happens, this was a watch and see what happens. David wasn’t passive or lazy or procrastinating, no, he intended for his plans to come to pass for he already started making preparations! So, what do you do when you’re not simply sharing a good idea moment, but your BUT GOD, steps in when you’ve calculated all the numbers, you’ve assembled the team, you’ve drawn up the blueprints, you already know what it’s going to be named and the completion date is already scheduled in ink in your mind. Until God Steps In And Interrupts Your Process, Progress and Plans with a BUT GOD moment! How do you handle it?!

Well, while you think that over, let’s look at another “…BUT GOD…” Interruption:

“Beloved, my whole concern was to write to you in regard to our common salvation. [BUT] I found it necessary and was impelled to write you and urgently appeal to and exhort [you] to contend for the faith which was once for all handed down to the saints [the faith which is that sum of Christian belief which was delivered verbally to the holy people of God].” (Jude 1:3 AMP).

Jude’s WHOLE CONCERN was to write one thing, BUT he found it more necessary and impelling to write urgently about something else. You see, BUT GOD moments aren’t just from God. When you learn to align your faith and hearing and godly wisdom with God, there are some thing’s where your spirit will put a pause on your plans! When you learn how to move according to God’s purpose and plans you can stop yourself and say, ‘I know I desired to do that, and there was nothing wrong with it, but there is an urgency in my spirit to do this instead.’ You’ll learn how to sharpen your perspective to such a degree that you’ll input BUT GOD moments in the middle of your own plans!

Max Lucado writes, “I awoke early one morning for a meeting…[and] spotted a bag of cookies. Our daughter had attended a bake sale so I thought she must’ve set them out for me. I ate one…interesting texture…I ate a second…with coffee it made an interesting option. I grabbed a third for the road, and would have grabbed the fourth but only one remained. Later my wife phoned, ‘Looks like someone’s been in the bag.’ ‘It was me,’ I admitted. ‘I’ve had better breakfast cookies but those weren’t bad.’ ‘Those weren’t breakfast cookies,’ she replied, ‘they were homemade dog biscuits!’ His response? ‘All day when I scratched my belly, my leg kicked…not to mention my new found interest in fire hydrants!’ Moral of the Story: I SHOULD’VE CONSULTED THE MAKER FIRST BEFORE BECOMING A PARTAKER!”

As comical as that may sound, it is actually the truth for many of us. We just make choices without ever considering the consequences. And honestly the consequences wouldn’t be so harsh if we first consulted God before making our choices!

James 1:5, “If any of you lacks wisdom [to guide him through a decision or circumstance], he is to ask of [our benevolent] God, who gives to everyone generously and without rebuke or blame, and it will be given to him.” (AMP)

In Max Lucado’s story, could you imagine how different this scenario could’ve gone, had he FIRST asked permission to take what didn’t belong to him in the FIRST place? And even if he thought it was for him, how bad could it have hurt to simply ask “are these for me”? Because the Bible does not lie: “There is a way which SEEMS right to a man and APPEARS straight before him, but at the end of it is the way of death” (Proverbs 14:12 AMP). Often many of us suffer because we chose what SEEMED and APPEARED right! But had we asked God for clarity, we would have SEEN it for what it really was, a Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing! God alone can see clearly behind the mask, the makeup and the materials! You simply cannot hide behind the disguise of someone who is the creator of Discernment! So why not ask Him first?! Which is why the Bible says, “[Not in your own strength] for it is God Who is all the while effectually at work in you [energizing and creating in you the power and desire], both to will and to work for His good pleasure and satisfaction and delight” (Philippians 2:13 AMP). It’s not your work, it’s His Work In You that brings Him Good Pleasure and Satisfaction and Delight! We have a bad tendency to get this backwards!

When you sense “A Hold” in your spirit, it’s more than likely God Himself trying to get your attention! Remember: He promised to, “…guide you along the BEST pathway for your life…advise you and watch over you.” (Psalm 32:8 NLT). Did you catch that? When God guides you, you will always be found traveling down the BEST pathway for your life! Not so-so, not alright, not pretty good, but when God guides, you only go down the BEST road! Who would be foolish enough to go at it alone when this is the promise from God Himself? The Worse Thing You Can Do Is Ignore The Best Advice, Which Is Following God’s Guidance!

Remember: Jude said, “I wanted very much to write you about salvation…BUT I felt the need to write…about something else.” Jude wanted to dedicate his epistle to one topic, BUT GOD had other plans! And as you well know, you cannot alter God’s Plan! And as great as His plans are, who would want to? “This is God’s Word on the subject:…I’ll show up and take care of you as I promised and bring you back home. I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.” (Jeremiah 29:10-11 MSG). I reiterate, who would dare mess up plans like those?

A century ago F.B. Meyer wrote, “Are you in difficulty about your way? Go to God…get direction from the light of his smile or the cloud of his refusal…wait there silent and expectant, though all around you insist on immediate decision or action – the Will of God will be made clear; and you’ll have a new conception of God.” If only we’d finally learn the benefit and blessing of going to God for direction, and sitting quietly and patiently until we receive it…

Which reminds us a lot of Proverbs 16:9, “You may make your plans, BUT GOD directs your actions” (GNT). Those “…BUT GOD…” moments are everywhere! That’s why it’s so important that you don’t take a step in ANY direction without FIRST receiving God’s DIRECTIONS!

It’s said when Columbus set out he didn’t know where he was GOING, when he arrived he didn’t know where he WAS, and when he returned he didn’t know where he’d BEEN! Truth is, from time to time we all need help knowing which direction to go; such as whether or not to relocate, take a certain job, or commit to a particular relationship. Which is why the Scripture says, “We should make plans – counting on God to direct us” (Proverbs 16:9 TLB).

Proverbs 3:5-12, “Trust God from the bottom of your heart; don’t try to figure out everything on your own. Listen for God’s voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; He’s the one who will keep you on track. Don’t assume that you know it all. Run to God…” (MSG)

Here’s an example, BEFORE making his decision, the Bible says, “…David ASKED THE LORD, “SHOULD I GO UP…” (2 Samuel 2:1 NLV). Now, that’s what you call a Wise Man! Might I ask, do you do the same? Do you ask or “Inquire” of the Lord? That word “Inquire” means “to ask for information.” Its Latin Origin “Inquirere”, from “Quaerere” literally means “Seek”. And what does the Bible say about “Seeking”? “BUT SEEK (AIM AT AND STRIVE AFTER) FIRST OF ALL HIS KINGDOM AND HIS RIGHTEOUSNESS (HIS WAY OF DOING AND BEING RIGHT), AND THEN ALL THESE THINGS TAKEN TOGETHER WILL BE GIVEN YOU BESIDES” (Matthew 6:33 AMP) I would definitely, without a doubt, say that often we go wrong because we don’t First Seek God for the Right way to go!

And why is it so important that we go to God first for direction? Because, truth is, you never know what God will do, say or think because the Scripture holds true: “This plan of mine is not what you would work out, neither are my thoughts the same as yours! For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than yours, and my thoughts than yours.” (Isaiah 55:8-9 TLB).

Which is why we should further follow the advice found in the book of Jeremiah: “ASK ME and I will tell you some remarkable secrets about what is going to happen here” (Jeremiah 33:3 TLB). And what’s the benefit of ASKING? The Bible says, “ASK, AND YOU WILL BE GIVEN WHAT YOU ASK FOR. Seek, and you will find. Knock, and the door will be opened.” (Matthew 7:7 AMP)

People of God, if you would simply ASK GOD, you may better understand the BUT GOD and therefore render to Him a YET GOD trust that has no room for fear, doubt, panic, worry, fret, unbelief or hurry!

Ask God so He can direct you! And how does He direct us? In a variety of ways, but here’s 3 in a nutshell:

1…HIS WORD: “Let the peace of Christ keep you in tune with each other, in step with each other. None of this going off and doing your own thing. And cultivate thankfulness. LET THE WORD OF CHRIST—THE MESSAGE—HAVE THE RUN OF THE HOUSE. GIVE IT PLENTY OF ROOM IN YOUR LIVES. Instruct and direct one another using good common sense. And sing, sing your hearts out to God! Let every detail in your lives—words, actions, whatever—be done in the name of the Master, Jesus, thanking God the Father every step of the way.” (Colossians 3:15-17 MSG). One author writes: “The Bible is to God what a surgical glove is to a surgeon. He reaches through it to touch deep within you.” But that requires reading it, personalizing it, and acting on it. And often the reason we stay in the stuff we’re in so long is because we don’t turn to the Word of God which is the instrument He uses to get us out! “He sends forth His Word and heals them and rescues them from the pit and destruction” (Psalm 107:20 AMP). We could get out of a world of trouble, if only we’d get into the Word of God!

2…PRAYER AND LISTENING FOR HIS VOICE: Jesus said, “My sheep listen to My voice. I know them and they follow Me.” (John 10:27 CEB). And Isaiah adds, “And if you leave God’s paths and go astray, you will hear a voice behind you say, “No, this is the way; walk here.” (TLB). Can you imagine being so loved by God that He watches everywhere you go, and even when you go wrong, His voice is right there telling you how to get right back on track? Psalm 119:9-16, “How can a young person live a clean life? By carefully reading the map of Your Word. I’m single-minded in pursuit of You; don’t let me miss the road signs You’ve posted. I’ve banked Your promises in the vault of my heart so I won’t sin myself bankrupt. Be blessed, God; train me in Your ways of wise living. I’ll transfer to my lips all the counsel that comes from Your mouth; I delight far more in what You tell me about living than in gathering a pile of riches. I ponder every morsel of wisdom from You, I attentively watch how You’ve done it. I relish everything You’ve told me of life, I won’t forget a word of it.” (MSG). If you want to stay on Track, Follow carefully the Directions of the Map of God’s Word! I would even dare say that we often travel down the wrong path so long, not because God isn’t speaking and giving us direction, but because we’re simply not listening! James 1:19, “Understand this, my beloved brothers and sisters. Let everyone be quick to hear [be a careful, thoughtful listener], slow to speak [a speaker of carefully chosen words and], slow to anger [patient, reflective, forgiving];” (AMP). And what’s the best way to listen for His voice, PRAYER! “Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.” (Philippians 4:6-7 MSG).

3…WISE COUNSEL: “Without good direction, people lose their way; the more wise counsel you follow, the better your chances” (Proverbs 11:14 MSG); “Where there is no counsel, purposes are frustrated, but with many counselors they are accomplished” (Proverbs 15:22 AMP). Believe it or not, but others have sat where you are currently seated: “Remember your leaders who taught you the Word of God. Think of all the good that has come from their lives, and follow the example of their faith” (Hebrews 13:7 NLT). In other words, is your business floundering? Then talk to a successful businessperson. Are you experiencing a mid-life crisis? Before doing something you’ll regret, ask for help. Is your marriage failing? Then talk to a couple who’ve sat where you’re sitting, but they are standing strong now. Are your kids straying? Then talk to someone who knows what it feels like to see your kids go astray, and then return back to the path in which they were trained upon. Are your finances a mess? Then talk to someone who has managed to become financially secure and debt free. Are you insecure? Then talk to someone who can teach you about self-confidence. Believe it or not, but you are not the first one, the only one, or the last one! God has done it before and He will do it again. But you’ll never know that if you don’t talk to Wise Counselors! “Fools are headstrong and do what they like; wise people take advice” (Proverbs 12:15 MSG).

Remember: Life comes with a lot of “…BUT GOD…” moments, but when you grow in God, increase your prayer life, maintain your faith, refresh your hope, diligently study the Word of God, obey the voice of God, seek God for direction, trust and follow the plan, purpose and Will of God and surround yourself with wise counselors, you’ll become just like David, and find a “…YET GOD…” and be greatly encouraged even through your “…BUT GOD…” moments!

Psalm 73:26, “My flesh and my heart may fail, BUT GOD is the rock and strength of my heart and my portion forever.” (AMP)

Romans 5:8, “BUT GOD clearly shows and proves His own love for us, by the fact that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” (AMP)

2 Chronicles 20:15, “He said, “Listen carefully, all [you people of] Judah, and you inhabitants of Jerusalem, and King Jehoshaphat. The Lord says this to you: ‘Be not afraid or dismayed at this great multitude, for the battle is not yours, BUT GOD’S.” (AMP)

 “You may feel lost and alone, BUT GOD knows exactly where you are, and He has a good plan for your life.” (Author Unknown)

“Sometimes my plans fail, BUT GOD always gives me a better option.” (Author Unknown)

“You may have weaknesses, BUT GOD has strength. You may have sin, BUT GOD has grace. You may fail, BUT GOD remains faithful.” (Author Unknown)

“When we have nothing left, BUT GOD, we discover that God is enough.” (Author Unknown)

“The Bible is not man’s word about God, BUT GOD’S Word about man.” (John Barth)

“Sin does not stop God’s grace from flowing, BUT GOD’S grace will stop sin.” (Joseph Prince)

“My philosophy is: Life is hard, BUT GOD is good. Try not to confuse the two.” (Anne F. Beiler)

“People may do you wrong, BUT GOD will be your vindicator. Situations may look impossible, BUT GOD will do the impossible.” (Joel Osteen)

“Man gives you the award, BUT GOD gives you the reward.” (Denzel Washington)

“BUT, GOD knows best, I concluded.” (Anne Bronte)

“You may not understand it. It may not seem fair, BUT GOD knows what He’s doing.” (Author Unknown)

“BUT GOD is when God backspaces over a period and makes it a comma.” (Author Unknown)

“Things change, people change, places change, careers change, BUT GOD will never change!” (Author Unknown)

“The enemy will try to label you with everything you’ve done wrong. BUT GOD labels you forgiven, redeemed, and restored.” (Joel Osteen)

“Evil may have its hour, BUT GOD will have His day.” (Fulton J. Sheen)

“The devil is busy BUT GOD is busier. Always remember that God is in control.” (Lynette Lewis)

“It may look impossible, BUT GOD can do the impossible. Just because you don’t see anything happening doesn’t mean God is not working.” (Joel Osteen)

“The world changes constantly and dramatically, BUT GOD, His commandments, and promised blessings do not change. They are immutable and unchanging.” (Elder L. Tom Perry)

“When you have nothing left BUT GOD, you have more than enough to start over again.” (Mother Teresa)

“I’ve been let down, and knocked down, BUT GOD has never failed to help me up again.” (Author Unknown)

“The stars may fall, BUT GOD’S promises will stand and be fulfilled.” (J.I. Packer)

“Circumstances may appear to wreck our lives and God’s plans, BUT GOD is not helpless among the ruins. God’s love is still working. He comes in and takes the calamity and uses it victoriously, working out His wonderful plan of love.” (Eric Liddell)

“It’s true my father abused me and didn’t love and protect me the way he should have, and at times it seemed no one would ever help me and it would never end. BUT GOD always had a plan for my life, and He has redeemed me.” (Joyce Meyer)

“The facts may tell you one thing. BUT GOD is not limited by the facts. Choose faith in spite of the facts.” (Joel Osteen)

“Good is not always God’s Will, but God’s Will is always good.” (Watchman Nee)

“You don’t have to respond to those who attack, belittle, or insult you. You may not see it, BUT GOD is dealing with them. If they persist, He will arrange their harvest in such a way that they’ll know it’s because of what they did to you.” (Hart Ramsey)

“Life may not be fair, BUT GOD is always faithful.” (Toby Mac)

“I got to that desperate place where nobody could help me BUT GOD.” (Cheryl James)

“People are fickle. They’ll love you today, and leave you tomorrow. BUT GOD made you a promise that He’ll never leave you or forsake you. That you can bank on!” (Marvin Sapp)

“Man plans, BUT GOD arranges.” (Thomas A. Kempis)

“No matter what may be happening today, God has good things in store for your future! It may not be easy to see now, BUT GOD has already lined up a new beginning, new friendships and new opportunities just for you.” (Joel Osteen)

“When our deepest desire is not the things of God, or a favor from God, BUT GOD Himself, we cross a threshold.” (Max Lucado)

“God loves you simply because He has chosen to do so. He loves you when you don’t feel lovely. He loves you when no one else loves you. Others may abandon you, divorce you, and ignore you, BUT GOD will love you always. No matter what!” (Max Lucado)

“We can’t always see where the road leads, BUT GOD promises there’s something better up ahead we just have to trust Him.” (Author Unknown)

“Bottom Line: God will not allow any person to keep you from your destiny. They may be bigger, stronger, or more powerful, BUT GOD knows how to shift things around and get you to where you’re supposed to be.” (Joel Osteen)

“Your miracle may be taking a long time. BUT GOD did not bring you this far to leave you.” (Toby Mac)

“Trust God to make a way. Sometimes we can only see what’s in front of us, BUT GOD sees the big picture.” (Author Unknown)

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“Only FOOLS Refuse God’s WISDOM”

Joshua 9:14-15, “So the men [of Israel] took some of their own provisions [and offered them in friendship], and [FOOLISHLY] did not ask for the counsel of the Lord. Joshua made peace with them and made a covenant (treaty) with them, to let them live; and the leaders of the congregation [of Israel] swore an oath to them.” (AMP)

It was an amusing billboard actually; a cartoon drawing of a wide-eyed, bewildered-looking squirrel, holding a broken cable in his paws. The sign that came with it simply read, “Call before you dig”, and gave a toll-free phone number. Well, I’ve come to discover that many utility workers have this problem and have it quite often. You see, squirrels start digging into the wires and they cut right into the utility workers power lines and cables. Lines which could very easily be gas lines, phone lines, or cables. And in the process, the happy diggers make a big mess for the utility company and their customers. A mess that could have easily been avoided had they asked about the dangers before they started digging. Now, squirrels may not know any better, but sadly neither do most people!

Which is why it really is a good idea to check with the people ‘in the know’ before you just start plowing ahead! It’s our failure to check with the Person who’s really ‘in the know’ that explains many of our costly mistakes, that have caused some of the biggest messes in our lives, and in the lives of all those connected to us!

Warning: People CONNECTED to You are EFFECTED by You…For Good or Bad!

Consider the example in Joshua 9:14-15. The Jews have been winning one victory after another over the Canaanites as they took possession of the Promised Land that God was giving them. Now, they are about to come upon Gibeon, one of the royal cities of Canaan. The Gibeonites have heard about the fall of the other cities the Jews have gone against. They know they’re going down next unless they can trick God’s people somehow into making a peace treaty with them, which seems unlikely in light of the fact that God’s Orders are to remove every tribe from the land and Not to coexist with them!

But the Gibeonites are shrewd. They sent a delegation to see Joshua, with donkeys loaded with cracked wineskins and worn-out sacks. They wore patched sandals and old clothes, and they carried dry and moldy bread with them. The whole scam was to make it LOOK LIKE they were from far away and that they had come on a long journey. Here’s how Joshua and his men decided what to do with these Gibeonites, The Bible says, “The Israelites sampled their provisions (so they made sure the bread was really dry and moldy) BUT THEY DID NOT INQUIRE OF THE LORD. Then Joshua made a treaty of peace with them to let them live, and the leaders of the assembly ratified it by oath.” (NIV)

Do you know, within days, the Jews learned that the Gibeonites weren’t from far away; in fact, they were from close by. But because they had been tricked into this treaty, they could not, by honor, remove them as God had originally commanded. As a result, the hands of the Jews were tied for years to come, and the treaty actually sparked a major battle with other armies. How did this mess happen? Well, in a nutshell, they didn’t call before they dug, much like the squirrels! They decided on the basis of what SEEMED right to them, but they made the fatal mistake so many of us have made so many times before –THEY DIDN’T CHECK WITH HEAVEN…THEY DIDN’T CHECK WITH GOD! And so they blew it! And so do we!

Listen to the text in varying translation:

“The Israelites TRIED some of the food, BUT THEY DID NOT ASK THE LORD IF HE WANTED THEM TO MAKE A TREATY.” (CEV);

“The men of Israel wanted to know if these men were telling the truth. So they TASTED the bread – BUT THEY DID NOT ASK THE LORD WHAT THEY SHOULD DO.” (ERV);

“The Israelites ACCEPTED some food from them, BUT DID NOT CONSULT THE LORD ABOUT IT.” (GNT);

“Joshua and the other leaders finally believed them. THEY DID NOT BOTHER TO ASK THE LORD BUT WENT AHEAD AND SIGNED A PEACE TREATY…” (TLB);

“So the Israelites EXAMINED their food, BUT THEY DID NOT CONSULT THE LORD.” (NLT);

“The men of Israel LOOKED them over and ACCEPTED the EVIDENCE. BUT THEY DIDN’T ASK GOD ABOUT IT.” (MSG);

“The men BELIEVED the EVIDENCE they were shown, BUT THEY DID NOT ASK THE LORD ABOUT IT.” (GWT);

Now, this is where many of us mess up and get messy! Like the Israelites, we’ll try it; take some; taste it; sample it; exam it, believe it, and even eventually accept it…but what we fail to do is to ask God what to do about it and with it! The Israelites (like many of us) were cautious, they checked out what was presented to them, however, the final decision was not theirs to make (and not ours either)!

“The Israelites took some of their supplies, BUT THEY DIDN’T ASK FOR ANY DECISION FROM THE LORD.” (CEB)

And can we be honest? We Get in the Worst Predicaments Because We Forget God Knows Best!

The decision was the Lord’s to make! They were to consult Him. And even with the decisions He allows us to be a part of, we are still to consult the Lord! And it’s not because they didn’t know any better, so they don’t even have that as a justifiable excuse and neither do we!

James 1:5, “If any of you lacks wisdom [TO GUIDE HIM THROUGH A DECISION OR CIRCUMSTANCE], he is to ask of [our benevolent] God, who gives to everyone generously and without rebuke or blame, and it will be given to him.” (AMP)

When God Himself is telling you to use His Wisdom, only a Fool would refuse!

God is there to Help, not to Hinder us! But He’s not rudely forcing Himself on us either! But He’s laid out for us the safest way to travel if only we’d adhere to it! Proverbs 3:5-6, “Trust in and rely confidently on the Lord with all your heart AND DO NOT RELY ON YOUR OWN INSIGHT OR UNDERSTANDING. IN ALL YOUR WAYS know and acknowledge and recognize Him, and HE will make your paths straight and smooth [REMOVING OBSTACLES THAT BLOCK YOUR WAY].” (AMP) Do you realize just how smooth this journey of ours could be if only we’d humble ourselves enough to follow His lead? We wouldn’t even have to worry about the bumps in the road along the way because He promises to “…remove obstacles that block our way.” But no, we insist on doing things our own way! And what is the result of that decision?

Proverbs 16:25, “There’s a way that looks harmless enough; look again – it leads straight to hell.” (MSG) Surely that’s the destination you were hoping to reach, right?

Don’t you see, we’re much like the Israelites, as soon as something (or someone) APPEARS to be alright; APPEARS to check out; APPEARS to be on the up-and-up, we jump head long into a mess with eyes wide open! All we know is that it “…LOOKS HARMLESS ENOUGH…” but so does she (until you get married to her and her $100,000.00 debt); so does he (until his perfect tall, dark and handsome exposes you to an STD); so does that church (but little do you know they’re only concerned with the prosperity of your pockets and not the prosperity of your soul); so does that business (until you find out the under-handed methods they use to keep it afloat)! What am I saying? Ask God Before You Decide It or They Are Really the Answer You Were Looking For! This could literally save your very life!

Think of all the divorces that could have been avoided had the individuals sought the Lord FIRST! When our children messed up, imagine how quickly they could have cleaned up, if we FIRST helped them God’s way instead of ours! The many soul ties that would never have tangled up your peace of mind if only you’d sought the Lord’s decision in the matter, FIRST! How many broken hearts that would not have needed years to mend, if only we sought the Lord FIRST. Many of us would not have to start over (for the 97^th time, just this week) if only we’d sought the Lord FIRST! So much unnecessary pain, so many unnecessary complications and difficulties and conflicts, and all because of our failure to seek God’s direction FIRST!  And in this day and time of read your horoscope; find your inner-self; reach for a higher power; let them read your palm; check out the tarot cards; let the soothsayers soothe you; (You Need to Know to Seek God FIRST!)

Isaiah 8:19-22, “When people tell you, “Try out the fortunetellers. Consult the spiritualists. Why not tap into the spirit-world, get in touch with the dead?” Tell them, “NO, WE’RE GOING TO STUDY THE SCRIPTURES.” People who try the other ways get nowhere – a dead end! Frustrated and famished, they try one thing after another. When nothing works out they get angry, cursing first this god and then that one, looking this way and that, up, down, and sideways – and seeing nothing, a blank wall, an empty hole. They end up in the dark with nothing.” (MSG)

And why would anyone want to waste time on such Foolishness when you have direct access to the Wisdom of God? That’s Who you seek…FIRST! When you’re wondering which direction and what to do, seek God FIRST! Jeremiah 33:3, “This is God’s Message, the God who made earth, made it livable and lasting, known everywhere as God: “Call to Me and I will answer you. I’ll tell you marvelous and wondrous things that you could never figure out on your own.” (MSG) With that as your best option, how could you chose anything different? You do not have to figure out life on your own (and thank God, because clearly WE are not good at decision making on our own)! And who cares, since we can simply call to our Father and He will answer His children with marvelous things that we don’t have to keep digging to find on our own!

Isaiah 65:24, “I will answer them before they even call to Me. While they are still talking to Me about their needs, I will go ahead and answer their prayers!” (TLB) Why try to figure out something God has already figured out? All you have to do is ask Him for the answer!

However, truth is, we neglect to check with God for many reasons. We’re in too big of a hurry, we’re feeling pressured by other people, we compromise for the sake of convenience, or we just plain know how we want it to be and we stubbornly blaze ahead with our own will. Sometimes, we may even be doing God’s thing, but it’s not God’s time or it’s not God’s way. Which is why it’s so vital that we “lean not on our own understanding,” which can only see part of the picture. When you consult with the Lord, you’re getting direction from the only One who can see the whole picture. That’s why counsel before decisions is so important! Proverbs 15:22, “Refuse good advice and watch your plans fail; take good counsel and watch them succeed.” (MSG)

Listen, in 2 Chronicles 18:4, King Jehoshaphat gave King Ahab this advice before he went running off into battle: “…FIRST, seek the counsel of the Lord.” (NIV) Here’s a few additional translations:

“…Please inquire FIRST for the Word of the Lord.” (AMP);

“…Inquire FIRST, I pray you, for the Word of the Lord today.” (AMPC);

“…FIRST, let’s see what the Lord has to say.” (CEB);

“But FIRST let’s ask the Lord what to do.” (CEV);

“But FIRST let’s ask the Lord for advice.” (ERV);

“…“But FIRST, find out what the Lord’s Word is in this matter.” (GWT);

“…But FIRST let’s consult the Lord.” (GNT);

“…However, let’s check with the Lord FIRST.” (TLB);

“…BUT BEFORE YOU DO ANYTHING, ASK GOD FOR GUIDANCE.” (MSG);

“…But FIRST we should ask if this is the Lord’s Will.” (NCV);

Are you starting to see the clear picture now? There’s a plan in place, however, Jehoshaphat (the wise leader) says, FIRST, let’s inquire of the Lord; let’s see what the Word of the Lord is for today; let’s see what He has to say; let’s ask Him what we should do; let’s ask for His advice; let’s find out what He has to say about this particular matter; let’s consult Him; let’s see if this is even His Will; BEFORE WE DO ANYTHING…LET’S ASK GOD TO GUIDE US! Yet, even with all of that admonishment, in the end, King Ahab didn’t, and because he didn’t, he died in that battle!

Do I dare ask how much money you would not have lost if you sought God FIRST? How much of your integrity, dignity and character would still be intact if you sought the Lord FIRST? How many mistakes and missteps could you have avoided if only you asked if this or they were in His Will for your life? Maybe you wouldn’t have lost the job, the house, the car, the career, the ministry or church, if only you would have asked God for His Guidance, before deciding to Go Your Own Way…Only to Have Crashed Over the Cliff Where He Already Had Warning Signs in Place!

And LEADERS, this is dangerous for us as well, listen to the text again in closing: “JOSHUA AND THE OTHER LEADERS finally believed them. They did not bother to ask the Lord but went ahead and signed a peace treaty…” (TLB);

Leadership Means We’re Responsible For Everyone On Board, Whether We Sail Safely, or Sink Fatally. Which is why we (above all people) ought to use the Wisdom God has made available to us to lead people according to His Word, Way and Will…and NOT That of Our Own! Because in the end, these LEADERS made a decision (WITHOUT GOD) that affected the WHOLE CONGREGATION. And if we dare make the wrong decision, the Body of Christ, as a whole, is damaged. Because you can’t hurt your pinky and the rest of your hand not know what happened. And in the Body of Christ, whatever we do in the Body, affects the whole body. So let’s start today by asking the Lord to lead and guide us in the way we should go, not in the way we want to go. Let’s ask the Lord for His decision, His Word, His Will, His Way, and His Timing.

Why? Because we can avoid a lot of problems and a lot of pain if only we’ll instinctively check with God FIRST. Let’s stop being like squirrels on power lines, digging in and causing disruption to everyone and everything. Let’s decide today to stop making messy decisions!

I share this because we’ve entered another New Year. We have much indeed to be grateful for. However, this is also the time and season when everyone wants to be something new, try something new, go somewhere new. And nothing is wrong with New, when it’s the Lord’s doing: Isaiah 43:18-21, “This is what God says…Forget about what’s happened; don’t keep going over old history. Be alert, be present. I’M ABOUT TO DO SOMETHING BRAND-NEW. It’s bursting out! Don’t you see it?” (MSG) Listen, God doesn’t need anymore of your New Years’ Resolutions! If something is to be New, let Him do it instead of you attempting to experiment with it! Let God change it; alter it; move it; or send it…not you trying to make things (you want, but may not need) to happen!

This year, make one resolution only…SEEK GOD FIRST! Don’t go grabbing shovels and seeking new land, and start digging where God never intended you to. Wait! Seek His Counsel, whether it’s for marriage; a relationship; a friendship; a job offer; a school choice; a career move; leaving or starting a church; or going to the store to make a purchase…Wait On the Lords’ Timing and Direction and You’ll Never Be Steered Off Course!

Think about it, haven’t we already made the foolish mistake of making decisions without the Lord’s consult and wisdom? And as bad as those choices and consequences turned out to be…do you really want a New Year, with the same Old You, making all the same old errors…again? Of course not. So this year, if it’s the Last thing you do…SEEK THE LORD FIRST…Before You Start Digging and Deciding!

Matthew 6:30-33, “If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never even seen—don’t you think he’ll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I’m trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God’s giving. People who don’t know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don’t worry about missing out. You’ll find all your everyday human concerns will be met.” (MSG)

Psalm 37:23-24, “The steps of a [good] man are directed and established by the Lord when He delights in his way [and He busies Himself with his every step]. Though he falls, he shall not be utterly cast down, for the Lord grasps his hand in support and upholds him.” (AMPC)

REMEMBER: ONLY FOOLS REFUSE GOD’S WISDOM!

Psalm 14:1, “The [spiritually ignorant] fool has said in his heart, “There is no God.”
They are corrupt, they have committed repulsive and unspeakable deeds; There is no one who does good.” (AMP)

Romans 1:22, “Claiming to be wise, they became fools,” (AMP)

Proverbs 18:2, “A [closed-minded] fool does not delight in understanding, But only in revealing his personal opinions [unwittingly displaying his self-indulgence and his stupidity].” (AMP)

Proverbs 9:8, “Do not correct a scoffer [who foolishly ridicules and takes no responsibility for his error] or he will hate you; Correct a wise man [who learns from his error], and he will love you.” (AMP)

Proverbs 26:4, “Do not answer [nor pretend to agree with the frivolous comments of] a [closed-minded] fool according to his folly, Otherwise you, even you, will be like him.” (AMP)

Proverbs 1:7, “The [reverent] fear of the Lord [that is, worshiping Him and regarding Him as truly awesome] is the beginning and the preeminent part of knowledge [its starting point and its essence]; But arrogant fools despise [skillful and godly] wisdom and instruction and self-discipline.” (AMP)

Proverbs 29:11, “A [shortsighted] fool always loses his temper and displays his anger, But a wise man [uses self-control and] holds it back.” (AMP)

Proverbs 13:20, “He who walks [as a companion] with wise men will be wise,
But the companions of [conceited, dull-witted] fools [are fools themselves and] will experience harm.” (AMP)

Proverbs 12:16, “The [arrogant] fool’s anger is quickly known [because he lacks self-control and common sense], But a prudent man ignores an insult.” (AMP)

Proverbs 12:18, “There is one who speaks rashly like the thrusts of a sword,
But the tongue of the wise brings healing.” (AMP)

Ecclesiastes 7:9, “Do not be eager in your heart to be angry, For anger dwells in the heart of fools.” (AMP)

Ephesians 5:15-16, “Therefore see that you walk carefully [living life with honor, purpose, and courage; shunning those who tolerate and enable evil], not as the unwise, but as wise [sensible, intelligent, discerning people], making the very most of your time [on earth, recognizing and taking advantage of each opportunity and using it with wisdom and diligence], because the days are [filled with] evil.” (AMP)

Much Love, Dr. Shermaine #EnjoyTheRead #BeInspired #BeEncouraged #BeEmpowered #BeChallenged #ShareTheWordFeel free to also join us at: http://www.selfcarewithdrshermaine.blogspot.com Today’s Lesson: “Eat Healthy, Stay Fit and Live Well Over 50”

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“6 Rules For Anger Management”

Ephesians 4:25-32 “What this adds up to, then, is this: no more lies, no more pretense. Tell your neighbor the truth. In Christ’s body we’re all connected to each other, after all. When you lie to others, you end up lying to yourself. GO AHEAD AND BE ANGRY. YOU DO WELL TO BE ANGRY—BUT DON’T USE YOUR ANGER AS FUEL FOR REVENGE. AND DON’T STAY ANGRY. DON’T GO TO BED ANGRY. Don’t give the Devil that kind of foothold in your life…Watch the way you talk. Let nothing foul or dirty come out of your mouth. Say only what helps, each word a gift. Don’t grieve God. Don’t break his heart. His Holy Spirit, moving and breathing in you, is the most intimate part of your life, making you fit for himself. Don’t take such a gift for granted. Make a clean break with all cutting, backbiting, profane talk. Be gentle with one another, sensitive. Forgive one another as quickly and thoroughly as God in Christ forgave you.” (MSG)                                                                    

Two forceful personalities in a relationship are like two rivers flowing into one; there’s going to be a Strong Current! Anger can be instant like a flash of lightning, or prolonged like the rumble of thunder! Sometimes we clash painfully, other times we distance and silently abandon the relationship. But Anger Handled the Right Way Doesn’t Have to be Destructive!

IMPORTANT: “Anger is only one letter short of Danger.” (Author Unknown).

So let’s discuss some of God’s Rules for Anger Management.

RULE #1—KEEP IT HONEST: Our text says, “…NO MORE LIES…” When You’re Angry Don’t Deny It! Believe it or not, Anger Can Be Constructive! Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton said: “Anger ventilated often hurries toward forgiveness; and concealed often hardens into revenge.” We’re right to get angry when people are mistreated and wrongs are not made right. Saying, ‘I’ve been feeling angry and because I value our relationship I’d like to talk about it,‘ Is Honest, Non-Threatening and Invites Resolution. 

Observe the following tidbits on Anger: 

a)   IGNORING, STIFLING, SUPPRESSING, OR PRETENDING YOU’RE NOT ANGRY IS DISHONEST: “Do not teach your children never to be angry; teach them how to be angry.” (Lyman Abbott).

b)   ANOTHER FORM OF LYING WHEN YOU’RE ANGRY IS EXAGGERATION: Phrases Like: ‘You NEVER listen to what I say.’ Or ‘You ALWAYS ignore my wishes.’ Or ‘NOBODY does anything around here except me.‘ Such Generalizations Are Untrue and Serve Only to Aggravate and Polarize, Guaranteeing the Real Problem Gets Obscured and Goes Unsolved. The truth is, maybe they weren’t listening; maybe your wishes are ignored and maybe you do more than others; BUT CAN YOU HONESTLY SAY THAT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME?! Remember this: “If you add to the truth, you subtract from it.” (The Talmud). So, do your best to avoid such words as ‘NEVER’; ‘ALWAYS’ and ‘NOBODY’. Keeping in mind that: “An exaggeration is a truth that has lost its temper.” (Kahlil Gibran).

c)   ANOTHER WAY TO LIE WHEN YOU’RE ANGRY IS BLAMING: Phrases Like: ‘If you’d arrive on time I wouldn’t have to nag you,’ or ‘If you’d quit nagging so much, maybe I’d start being on time.’ BLAMING IS A WAY OF EVADING YOUR OWN RESPONSIBILITY WHILE POINTING THE FINGER AT OTHERS! It angers others, perpetuates your own anger and never produces the result you want! I believe the following quote will put things in proper perspective for you: “If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn’t sit for a month.” (Unknown Author)…I know that hurt, but if applied, it will help!

God’s rule is always right:  ‘…Let each one of you speak truth with his neighbor…‘.

RULE #2—KEEP IT NON-LETHAL: Paul writes: ‘IN YOUR ANGER DO NOT SIN… ‘ (Ephesians 4:26 NIV). What do Paul’s words mean? DON’T LET YOUR ANGER ESCALATE TO THE POINT OF DOING DAMAGE! DON’T USE YOUR WORDS AS WEAPONS OR A CONTROL MECHANISM! “Sometimes when I’m angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn’t give me the right to be cruel.” (Author Unknown). It’s okay to express your emotions in A HEALTHY WAY, BUT KEEP THEM IN CHECK! “Not the fastest horse can catch a word spoken in anger.” (Chinese Proverb). Your goal must be to resolve the problem and strengthen the relationship, not ‘sound off’ and wound the other person! “Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.” (Ambrose Bierce). The Bible says it best: “…a crushed spirit who can bear?‘ (Proverbs 18:14 NIV). Now, is all this easy to do? NO! BUT YOU HAVE TO BE MINDFUL: WORDS SPOKEN IN JEST, SARCASM, SELF-RIGHTEOUSNESS OR ‘RIGHTEOUS INDIGNATION’ WOUND PEOPLE, AND SOMETIMES THOSE WOUNDS ARE PERMANENT! Hear the Word of the Lord: ‘A wholesome tongue is a tree of life, But perverseness in it breaks the spirit.‘ (Proverbs 15:4 NKJV). ‘ ‘The tongue can bring death… ‘ (Proverbs 18:21 NLT). Ungodly words, once unleashed, can: ‘…sink deep into one’s heart‘ (Proverbs 26:22 NLT). YOUR WORDS CAN LIVE IN THE HEART AND MEMORY OF A PERSON AND GO ALL THE WAY TO THE GRAVE WITH THEM! We say, ‘Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me,‘ BUT IT’S NOT TRUE! A PERSON CAN DIE OF A CRUSHED SPIRIT, AND THE ONE WHO SPOKE THE WORDS CAN LIVE TO REGRET THE DAMAGE THEY’VE INFLICTED AND NEVER GET A CHANCE TO UNDO IT! ON THE OTHER HAND, ANGER PROPERLY HANDLED NEVER NEEDS TO BE REPENTED OF! SO LEARN TO DIFFERENTIATE BETWEEN THE ANGER YOU FEEL AND THE WORDS YOU SPEAK! ANGER CAREFULLY THOUGHT THROUGH, CAN REVEAL IMPORTANT INFORMATION ABOUT NEEDED CHANGES!

RULE #3—KEEP IT CURRENT: Storing anger in your hard drive ONLY HURTS YOU! “Anger, if not restrained, is frequently more hurtful TO US than the injury that provokes it.” (Seneca). When you rehearse old resentments YOU GROW BITTER! But remember the words of Malachy McCourt, “Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die.” The Bible says: ‘The good man brings good things OUT OF THE GOOD STORED UP IN HIS HEART, and the evil man brings evil things OUT OF THE EVIL STORED UP IN HIS HEART. FOR OUT OF THE OVERFLOW OF HIS HEART HIS MOUTH SPEAKS‘ (Luke 6:45 NIV) The Contemporary English Bible says it like this: “Good people do good things BECAUSE OF THE GOOD IN THEIR HEARTS. Bad people do bad things BECAUSE OF THE EVIL IN THEIR HEARTS. YOUR WORDS SHOW WHAT IS IN YOUR HEART.” SO SILENCE ALL THOSE OLD ISSUES IN YOUR HEART BEFORE THEY GET TO TALKING AND REVEAL THE REAL YOU! “Anger dwells only in the bosom of FOOLS.” (Albert Einstein).

Therefore, when you’re angry, DEAL WITH IT QUICKLY! Don’t passively allow time to decide your options, or sit around hoping the other person will see the light and apologize! The Bible says: ‘If a fellow believer hurts you, GO AND TELL HIM—work it out between the two of you…confront him with the need for repentance, and offer again God’s forgiving love.” (Matthew 18:15-17 MSG). Did you read those instructions clearly? “…GO AND TELL HIM…” DON’T SIT BY IDLY WAITING FOR THEM TO COME TO YOU! GET UP AND GO TO THEM AND TRY TO RESOLVE THE PROBLEM AND RESTORE THE RELATIONSHIP! “Reconciliation is more beautiful than victory.” (Violeta Barrios de Chamorro).

When You Repress Reconciliation, You Add One More Skeleton to Your Closet! And Sooner or Later, Doctors Say, It’ll Eat at Your Stomach Lining, Attack Your Immune System, Predispose You to Heart Problems, Cancers and Other Physical, Social and Emotional Disorders! Meantime, It’ll Preoccupy You, Dissipate Your Energy, Cripple Your Creativity, Hinder Your Fellowship With God, Your Friends and Fellow Believers; Not to Mention That It Denies the Offender the Opportunity to Clear Their Conscience, Repent and Get Right With God and You! So Stop Dragging Up the Past, Trying to Blackmail the Guilty By Hauling Skeletons Out of Closets at ‘Auspicious’ Moments, Plotting Revenge, and Passing Down Resentments For the Next Generation to Carry!

Now, I don’t believe in Buddha, but I sure like his analogy: “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; BUT INSTEAD, YOU’RE THE ONE WHO GETS BURNED.” Tell me that’s not accurate! Therefore saints, ask God for the Humility and Courage to deal with Today’s Problems – TODAY! When your head hits the pillow tonight, know that your issues are Current, Up To Date with God and Everyone Else, and Sleep Well! “In peace I will both lie down and sleep, for You, Lord, alone make me dwell in safety and confident trust.” (Psalm 4:8 AMP).

RULE #4—KEEP IT SOLUTION-FOCUSED: Someone has said that fellowship is like two fellows in a ship: one can’t sink the other without sinking himself! In other words, by seeking to gain the upper hand you both lose! By seeking to save and strengthen the relationship you both win! So when you speak, be sure it’s ‘…helpful for building others up according to their needs…‘ (Ephesians 4:29 NIV). Maybe this Scripture would become clearer if you read it in the Amplified Bible, it states: “Let no foul or polluting language, nor evil word nor unwholesome or worthless talk [EVER] come out of your mouth, but only such [speech] as is GOOD and BENEFICIAL to the spiritual progress OF OTHERS, as is fitting to the need and the occasion, that it may be a blessing and give grace (God’s favor) TO THOSE WHO HEAR IT.” We Are Charged to Understand What the Other Person Needs! In doing so, YOU DO NOT BRING UP PREVIOUSLY CONFESSED OFFENSES; YOU DO NOT DRAG IN OTHER PEOPLE; You Do Not Use Wisecracks About People’s Weight, Height, Color, IQ, Physical, Mental and Emotional Limitations; and You Do Not Bring Up Unrelated Things or People That Cloud the Issue and Keep You From Finding a Solution! In addition, Don’t Raise the Volume In Order to Intimidate and Manipulate! God Made You With a Capacity For Anger Because When Handled the Right Way It’s the Fuel That Brings Needed Change and the Medicine That Heals. An unknown author stated: “You don’t have to attend every argument you’re invited to.”   

Keep that in mind as you: 

a) SEEK A SOLUTION, NOT A ‘VICTORY’: Name-calling and ‘diagnosing’ others only makes things worse. Your focus should not be on what they did, BUT ON WHAT YOU CAN DO TOGETHER TO RESOLVE IT.

b) ADMIT YOUR OWN FLAWS AND ASK FOR FORGIVENESS: Since it takes two to tango, acknowledging your OWN imperfections makes it easier for someone else to acknowledge theirs.

c) BEFORE YOU ATTEMPT TO TAKE A ‘SWING’ AT SOMEONE, MAKE SURE IT’S A POSITIVE ‘STROKE’: If you take the time to get your mind right, mere words will be no struggle! “Finally, believers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable and worthy of respect, whatever is right and confirmed by God’s word, whatever is pure and wholesome, whatever is lovely and brings peace, whatever is admirable and of good repute; if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, THINK continually on these things [CENTER YOUR MIND ON THEM, AND IMPLANT THEM IN YOUR HEART]. (Philippians 4:8 AMP). For each of the difficulties you have to address, GIVE A COMPLIMENT ALSO. Example: ‘I’m sure this wasn’t easy for you to hear, but thanks for listening to me so graciously.‘ CRITICISM DOESN’T CHANGE CHAOS TO CALM, BUT A COMPLIMENT SURE DOES!

RULE #5—KEEP IT IN THE LAUNDRY ROOM: “Let all bitterness and indignation and wrath (passion, rage, bad temper) and resentment (anger, animosity) and quarreling (brawling, clamor, contention) and slander (evil-speaking, abusive or blasphemous language) be banished from you, with all malice (spite, ill will, or baseness of any kind).” (Ephesians 4:31 AMP). MALICIOUS TALK IS LIKE WILDFIRE, IT CONSUMES THOSE WHO SPREAD IT AND THOSE WHO LISTEN TO IT! As my auntie would say, “don’t display your dirty wash; keep it in the laundry room.”

Saints, dirty laundry gets aired in two ways: 

1)   OPEN EMBARRASSMENT. YOU SAY IT WHERE YOU KNOW OTHERS ARE GOING TO HEAR IT!  But keep in mind: “A person’s character is revealed by their SPEECH.” (Greek Proverb). Solomon also gives us some wise advice to follow: “He who goes about as a talebearer REVEALS SECRETS, but he who is trustworthy and faithful in spirit KEEPS THE MATTER HIDDEN.” (Proverbs 11:13 AMP); “Prudent people don’t flaunt their knowledge; TALKATIVE FOOLS BROADCAST THEIR SILLINESS.” (Proverbs 12:23 MSG). SO WHETHER YOU REALIZE IT OR NOT, SPEAKING YOUR MIND, ONLY SPEAKS VOLUMES ABOUT YOUR LACK OF GOOD INTENTION AND INTEGRITY; YOUR LACK OF PROPER MOTIVE AND MATURITY AND YOUR LACK OF COMPASSION AND CHARACTER! “Outside show is a poor substitute for inner worth.” (Aesop). 

2) SUBTLETY. You make jokes about their figure, family members and friends, etc., IN ORDER TO BELITTLE THEM! This results in EMBARRASSMENT for the person you’re angry at, widens the gap between you AND MAKES RECONCILIATION IMPOSSIBLE!  So the next time you decide to crack a joke, EMBARRASS someone or speak your mind REMEMBER WHAT GOD SAID: “Let there be no filthiness (obscenity, indecency) nor foolish and sinful (silly and corrupt) talk, nor coarse jesting, WHICH IS NOT FITTING OR BECOMING…” (Ephesians 5:4 AMP). In addition, the next time you go to acting “SUBTLE” BE MINDFUL OF THE PERSON YOUR EMULATING: “NOW THE SERPENT was more SUBTLE and crafty than any living creature of the field…” (Genesis 3:1 AMP). Need I say more?! Even Paul warns Timothy about avoiding “Subtleties”: “O Timothy, guard and keep the deposit entrusted [to you]! TURN AWAY FROM THE IRREVERENT BABBLE AND GODLESS CHATTER, WITH THE VAIN AND EMPTY AND WORLDLY PHRASES, AND THE SUBTLETIES AND THE CONTRADICTIONS IN WHAT IS FALSELY CALLED KNOWLEDGE AND SPIRITUAL ILLUMINATION.” (1 Timothy 6:20 AMP). Keep in mind: “Subtlety may deceive you; integrity never will.” (Oliver Cromwell).

Solomon writes: ‘He who goes about as a talebearer reveals secrets, But he who is trustworthy conceals a matter‘ (Proverbs 11:13 NASB). SO, NO MATTER WHAT YOU KNOW ABOUT THEM, YOUR CHARACTER AS A CHRISTIAN OUGHT TO COMMISSION YOU TO CONCEAL THE MATTER! As believers, we possess “…the ministry of reconciliation.” (2 Corinthians 5:18) NOT THE MESSAGE OF REVENGE! Keep in mind: “While you are meditating revenge, THE DEVIL IS MEDITATING A RECRUIT.” (Francois de Malherbe). So are you going to be SAVED OR SATANIC? DIVINE OR DEMONIC? LIGHT OR DARK? YOU CAN’T HAVE IT BOTH WAYS! Paul makes that crystal clear: “…How can you make a partnership out of right and wrong? That’s not partnership; that’s war. Is light best friends with dark? Does Christ go strolling with the Devil? Do trust and mistrust hold hands? Who would think of setting up pagan idols in God’s holy Temple?…” (2 Corinthians 6:13-17 MSG). You can’t be Loving and Hateful, you need to make a choice. And just in case you need a little help, the Bible says: “Hatred stirs up trouble; love overlooks the wrongs that others do.” (Proverbs 10:12 CEV).  THAT ALONE SHOULD’VE TAKEN THE DIFFICULTY OUT OF YOUR DECISION!

RULE #6—BE PART OF THE CLEAN UP CREW: We say, ‘They brought it on themselves. Let them get over it.‘ They may have deserved it, but we can’t walk away and leave open wounds to become infected! We ‘Make a clean break with all cutting, backbiting, profane talk. Be gentle with one another, sensitive. Forgive one another as quickly and thoroughly as God in Christ forgave you.‘ (Ephesians 4:32 MSG). How did Christ forgive us? After we’d acknowledged, confessed and repented of our sins? No! The Bible says: ‘…when we were God’s enemies, we were reconciled to Him through the death of His Son…‘ (Romans 5:10 NIV). God took the initiative, so forgive, before the other person asks for forgiveness! And if you want to really show maturity, forgive them even if they Never ask for forgiveness! God didn’t allow you to remain His enemy for life (and He had good reason to); so show forth the same grace and mercy you receive and forgive them. Only then are you yourself forgiven, the wounds inflicted healed, and all parties records before God are expunged! Manage your anger before it causes you to act real Asinine (defined as “extremely stupid or foolish”)!

IN A NUTSHELL: TODAY IS A GOOD DAY TO OVERCOME ANGER!

Much Love, Dr. Shermaine #EnjoyTheRead #BeInspired #BeEncouraged #BeEmpowered #BeChallenged #ShareTheWord

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“The Marriage Triangle”

Most men would call it a ‘chick flick’, but I’m definitely a sucker for a good romantic comedy! They are my absolute favorites! But then so are some of the crazy dramas too, which almost always have the same theme proving the old cliché true, “two’s company, three’s a crowd.” But that’s really true, especially when it comes to romance. Example: Guy meets girl, guy falls in love with girl, guy falls in love with another girl in addition to the first girl. Which ultimately is like putting a match in gasoline! That is a centuries-old formula for an explosion! It’s the infamous love triangle! Soap operas thrive on them; marriages are destroyed by them!

A love triangle is usually a prescription for broken hearts unless you have the kind of love triangle that keeps hearts from being broken.

Now, there’s a formula in Ecclesiastes 4. It’s a formula for lasting bonds between people. You could very well call it the arithmetic of love. Here’s what it says beginning at verse 9, “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work. If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up. If two lie down together they will keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”

That passage is a powerful statement about relationships, especially if you apply it to the ultimate relationship of marriage. It says two work together better than one, two walk together better than one, two stand together better than one, and then suddenly the number changes. Suddenly it’s talking about three strands. Wait…I thought we were talking about two…So enter the love triangle: a husband, a wife, and God. That’s the kind of love triangle that avoids broken hearts. Ephesians 5:21 alludes to it when it says; speaking to husbands and wives, “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” (NIV). It’s the Jesus factor in a marriage that always makes the difference. Now, the triangle is the strongest geometric figure there is, and a love triangle with Christ at the top is virtually indestructible! In other words, you’ve got the man and woman joined together by that line along the bottom, but they both have a line going up to Jesus at the top. That bond between the man and the woman will fray sometimes. There’s interference, there’s disappointment, there’s disillusionment, there’s hurt. But if both the man and woman are connected to Christ at the top of the triangle, that bond will hold them together when the bond of human compatibility is unraveling.

The problem with many of us as spouses is, we don’t always keep Christ at the top of the triangle. Often we fight to be in the top slot that we push Him down, or take Him out of the equation altogether. But the only way for the love triangle with Jesus to work effectively, is to always be certain that He maintains His top priority position. While we’re fighting to be heard, fighting to be right, fighting to prove the other wrong, fighting to get the upper-hand, we undermine His hand on our Covenant. Which makes you wonder: As soon as we think divorce is the answer, isn’t it amazing when you share that theory with others, most will always ask, “have you prayed about it first?” Why do they ask that? Well, genius, you can’t call yourself a Christian then make a decision to Crucify your Covenant, and think people aren’t going to ask if you consulted Christ! Even other people are under the impression that you have Christ in your marriage! And so they ask the obvious question of “have you prayed about it first?” And more often than not, we haven’t, we just want a quick fix for what we’ve allowed to slowly break down over the years. We want Jesus, in the beginning, to bless our covenant, but as soon as conflict and crisis hits along the journey, we pull the marriage over, kick Jesus out from behind the wheel, and then drive our marriages right over the cliff! After all, how can you possibly think you can reach your marital destination without the only One who has the directions? And remember, we kicked Him out! But when you take over the Wheel, you lose your Way from His Will!

So, the question is, “How much is Jesus Christ a real Person and Presence in your marriage?” Do you pray together about real life issues as if Jesus is right there with you? “Lord, we’ve got to talk to You about this together.” In fact, when was the last time you prayed With your spouse? And not for houses, cars, land, business, ministry, money, promotion, elevation, or personal gain. But prayed With your spouse: “Lord, teach us to be loving, faithful, supportive, encouraging, kind, generous, patient, forgiving. Teach us to acknowledge one another’s strength’s and be patient and understanding in one another’s weaknesses. Teach us to be a better man and woman; better husband and wife; better father and mother; better son and daughter; better disciples; better believers, better friends, better spouses, better lovers, better teammates. Teach us to walk by faith and not by sight. Teach us to trust You when our finances or health is failing. Teach us to be Your mirror to the world of what unconditional love really looks like.” When is the last time you prayed With your spouse, not for personal gain, but for personal growth?

Do you often ask together, “What would Jesus do?” Are you cultivating the habit of sharing what Christ has said to you from His Word that day with each other? Are you at church together? Do you sit together? Do you labor in ministry together? Do you get on your knees together and fight for your family and children?

And though most ‘super-saved Christian’s’ may call it ‘carnal’, but do you also laugh together, watch television together, travel together, go to the movies, out to dinner, go shopping, do you still date and court your spouse? Do you call and text your spouse as much as you do everybody else? Are you in your spouses’ face more than you’re on Facebook? Do you share as many pictures with your spouse as you do with Instagram? Do you text your spouse as much as you tweet? Do you send flowers? Do you enjoy engaging conversation from talking about Jesus, to the weather, to the government, to what you ate for lunch? Do you take walks? Do you still share dreams, or have you only become each other’s nightmares? Do you sit down to dinner, in your own home, at your own dinner table, without the intruding guest of your cellphone, internet or social media? Do you go for a long drive? Picnic in the park? Weekend get-a-way to no-where in particular? Have you planned your vacation? Have you passionately made love to your spouse or do you simply settle for watching such scenes on movies screens with actors portraying the roles of marital bliss? I know, sounds ‘carnal’ to some, but for those who know that it takes your body, soul and spirit to make a marriage work, you get it! We don’t spend all of our time in church, in the Word or in prayer! Those things are wonderful, those things are needful, especially when they’re done as couples, however, going to the beach won’t send you to hell either! If you’re finding it difficult to laugh with your spouse over something silly, then something is wrong! Even Jesus, slept, ate, prayed, and wept…in other words, Jesus expressed His natural as well as His spiritual. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with you doing the very same! As a couple you can preach the walls of Jericho down, but when you’re done, go to Olive Garden and eat some pasta! Are you getting this?! You cannot expect to have an Enjoyable marriage that has no Joy!

Maybe the marriage is rotting because you’ve both stopped eating the fruit of the Spirit! Imagine if you digested daily more love for your spouse, more joy and peace with your spouse, more forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness and gentleness towards your spouse, and more self-control to keep yourself only for your spouse, you’d see a tremendous difference take place in your marriage. That’s the beauty of having Jesus not only in your marriage, or a part of your marriage, but having Him (His Spirit) as Head Over your marriage! Then, even on bad days, you could still be good to your spouse!

So, are you attempting to make marriage work with just the two of you, or have you considered a love triangle with Jesus? After all, who better to have in the midst of your marriage, and even in the midst of its’ problems then Jesus? Jesus saves, heals, delivers, forgives, understands, is patient, kind, loving, and generous. Who better to teach a couple such characteristics but the One who has exemplified such characteristics with the Godhead? Isn’t it amazing how they work together? And as a believer, you have the opportunity and privilege to invite them into your marriage to show you how to work together just like Them.

I’ve always said it, and always will, most often the issue in marriage isn’t ‘we’ve grown apart’, the issue is ‘we haven’t grown up.’ Marriage takes Maturity. It takes two people that will stop screaming ‘mine’ and start screaming ‘ours’. It takes two people that will stop trying to have their own way, and instead go in the way of God. It takes two people who learn to talk to each other and with each other not against each other and at each other. It takes two people who learn to attentively listen, even when they have so much they want to say. It takes sacrifice, and sacrifice is painful and bloody! No one has ever made a sacrifice and thought it was good or even felt good! It’s hard, it’s tough, it can be absolutely grueling, but when you remember the purpose and payoff of the sacrifice you’ll know it was worth it! But you have to ‘adult’ to get there! You can’t play the bully; you can’t be the whiner; you can’t pick the fight; you can’t run to your corner and call it quits; you can’t drag in reinforcements of the flesh, and think it will better anything! No! For this, you’ve got to grow up, mature, adult and fight to maintain the marriage you willfully made!

The good news? You don’t have to do it alone! If only we’d stop inviting and involving Jesus in the Wedding only…and start inviting and involving Jesus in the Marriage also, we’d be so much better! However, if truth be told, we have a bad tendency to invite everyone else into our marriages, Except Jesus. Oh, we’ll talk to family, friends, coworkers, and just people of interest that will lend an ear (some with pure motives and intentions, many without). But the One person we committed our vows before is the One person we overlook in marital trouble. We seek outside sources, when He’s waiting on the sidelines, ever so patient, for us to include Him back in the triangle. I mean, if it started with Him, shouldn’t we carry it all the way through with Him?

But sadly, we as a church live in a day and age where anyone, anything, everyone, everything is easily discarded. Can you imagine if we had to be perfect in order for Jesus to come? He would never have come because none of us are perfect. Instead, He came because our imperfections needed Him. He didn’t throw our sins in our face; He didn’t get joy out of our sorrows, pain or failures; He didn’t say that we weren’t good enough; He didn’t give us a laundry list of perfection to live up to before He came. And yet, we as believers, look for others, especially our spouses, to live up to an ideal that’s not ideal. We want them to cross every ‘T’ and dot every ‘I’, even though we don’t and we can’t. And so when we don’t get what we expected, imagined or wanted, we discard. Aren’t you grateful Jesus doesn’t work like that? Not even Judas’ betrayal; Peter’s denial; or Thomas’ doubts could make Him replace them. He loved them, embraced them, and accepted them as the flawed individuals they were. However, as spouses, we don’t always treat one another with the same unconditional love. We don’t extend the same grace, mercy, and forgiveness. We aren’t as patient, dedicated, or determined. No, we simply and quickly discard.

Which makes me wonder about many of us and our employment. So many of us work on jobs that we hate or with people we would much rather not even walk on the same sidewalk with. And yet, we never up and quit our jobs; we don’t leave; we don’t walk away; we don’t throw our hands up and throw the towel in. We can be frustrated, taken advantage of, misused, disrespected, treated unfairly and even poorly, and still, 30 years later, we’re on the same job. If only we treated marriages with the same commitment.

Oh, there will be days when you’ll want to file for divorce; days you’ll have no idea why you got married in the first place; days when you think ‘who is this person?’ There will be conflict, arguments and even misunderstandings. There will be days that are hard and nights that are long. But if you wouldn’t throw in the towel on a job with people you hate; how can you throw in the towel with the person you said you love? Know this: Eventually that job will have no need of you and will discard you (retirement). But you’re married to a person who’s in it ‘till death do we part’, and yet that’s the person you choose to resign from? Listen, marriage is hard, it’s work and there will be days when you feel like it’s more work than going to work! But is it still worth it? Absolutely. God still hates divorce; adultery is still a sin; and a vow made, should still be a vow maintained.

Let today be the day you re-exam your own marriage. Is Jesus still a part of it, or have the two of you given Him the boot? Is He still the first person you consult, or does He come in after you’ve called Tyrone; texted Sheila; emailed Leslie; or inboxed David? The Man who has given sight to the blind; speech to the mute; walking to the lame; and life to the dead can surely help your marriage, don’t you think?

As a kid, I remember playing all kinds of sports, I was a tom-boy after all. But one of the things everyone hated was to be picked last to be on a team. Is that what you’ve done to your spouse? Is that what you’ve done to your Jesus? Are they the last people you pick to play on your team? No one wants to feel as though they are in ‘add-on’. No one wants to feel like ‘I’ll get to you on my to-do-list when I can’. No one wants to feel unappreciated, undervalued, unwanted, unloved. So, make sure neither your spouse nor your Savior is feeling this way.

Lastly, when God is Love, how do you think you can manage a marriage without Him who is Love? The Father so full of love sent His very own Son to die just for us; Jesus so full of love laid down His own life, voluntarily, just for us; the Holy Spirit so full of love, has moved in and made His home in us, His temple. Now, just imagine if you invited and involved the Godhead into your marriage the level of love you both would be filled with?

Love triangles with people will destroy your marriage, but one with the Godhead ensures that it’s indestructible! Which will you choose today?

Before you get married, wait for someone who is joined to Jesus as you are, because it is worth the wait. And after you marry, practice His presence daily in your home. A love triangle with Jesus as that real third person is the strongest bond on earth!

“Determine to pray more words over your marriage than you speak about your marriage.” (Lysa TerKeurst)

“A husband and wife must function like two wings on the same bird. They must work together or the marriage will never get off the ground.” (Dave Willis)

“When you face a struggle in your marriage, remind yourself that the struggle will become a story someday. It will either be a story about why you divorced or a story about how you worked together to build a stronger marriage. You get to decide which story becomes true.” (Dave Willis)

“Marriage is not 50-50; divorce is 50-50. Marriage has to be 100-100. It’s not splitting everything in half, but giving everything you’ve got.” (Dave Willis)

“Love your spouse more than you love your career, hobbies and money. That other stuff can’t love you back.” (Dave Willis)

“Your children are learning about marriage by watching you. Treat your spouse the way you want your children’s future spouses to treat them someday.” (Dave Willis)

“When we get married, it is always helpful to remember that we are both sinners. Neither of us is perfect. We will mess up. We will at times hurt each other. And we will need to practice forgiveness.” (Simply One in Marriage)

“I want my life and my marriage to look less like the world and more like Christ.” (Marquis Clarke)

“Always strive to give your spouse the very best of yourself; not what’s left over after you have given your best to everyone else.” (Dave Willis)

“Great marriages don’t happen by luck or by accident. They are the result of a consistent investment of time, thoughtfulness, forgiveness, affection, prayer, mutual respect and a rock-solid commitment between a husband and wife.” (Dave Willis)

“Real Love is when you are completely committed to someone even when they are being completely unlovable.” (Dave Willis)

“In every disagreement with your spouse, remember that there is not a winner and a loser. You are united in everything, so you will either win together or lose together. Work together to find a solution where you both win.” (Dave Willis)

“Be the person you want to be married to.” (Author Unknown)

“Marriage is less about Perfection and more about Perseverance.” (Fierce Marriage)

“The more you Invest in your marriage, the more Valuable it becomes.” (Author Unknown)

“How to fight in a Christian Marriage: Shut Up; Back Up; Pray Up; Make Up.” (Matthew Jacobson)

“More marriages might survive if the partners realized that sometimes the Better comes after the Worse.” (Doug Larson)

“A strong marriage rarely has two strong people at the same time. It is a husband and wife who take turns being strong for each other in the moments when the other feels weak.” (Author Unknown)

“A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” (Author Unknown)

“There is no challenge strong enough to destroy your marriage as long as you are both willing to stop fighting against each other and start fighting for each other.” (Dave Willis)

“Your marriage will not be defined by the size of your struggles, but by the size of your commitment to overcome the struggles together.” (Dave Willis)

“Your marriage vows are most important in those moments when they are most difficult to keep.” (Dave Willis)

“We charge our cellphones daily but let our marriages die. If your smartphone receives more daily charging than your spouse, then you’re spending way too much time talking to the wrong people.” (Marriage365)

“Couples who make it aren’t the ones who never had a reason to divorce; they are simply the ones who decided early on that their commitment to each other was always going to be bigger than their differences and flaws.” (Dave Willis)

“When forced to choose between your career and your spouse, your friends and your spouse, or even your family and your spouse, you must always choose to put your spouse ahead of the rest. If your first loyalty isn’t to your spouse, then you don’t really understand the meaning of marriage.” (Dave Willis)

“The problem with marriage today isn’t marriage. The problem is the people going into it have no idea what they’re committing to. Marriage is more than two rings, and a pretty dress. It’s a covenant to be kept.” (Meaningful Marriages)

“Your spouse is the one person who has seen you at your worst; smelled your morning breath, put up with your crazy relatives; endured your quirky habits and still loves you more than anyone on earth.” (Dave Willis)

“Your spouse should never have to face any struggle without your full partnership, encouragement, and support.” (Dave Willis)

“If every couple quit when marriage got difficult, 100% of couples would be divorced. Challenges in your marriage are an opportunity to work together, not an excuse to give up on each other.” (Dave Willis)

“Lifelong love isn’t the result of Compatibility. It’s the result of Commitment.” (Dave Willis)

“In most cases, the only person who ‘wins’ in a divorce is the attorney. The husband and wife both suffer heavy losses financially, relationally, and emotionally.” (Dave Willis)

“Secrecy is the enemy of intimacy. Every healthy relationship is built on a foundation of honesty and trust.” (Dave Willis)

“Don’t just be physically monogamous; be mentally monogamous as well. True intimacy begins in the heart and the mind; not in the bedroom.” (Dave Willis)

“Never trade temporary pleasure for permanent regret.” (Dave Willis)

“Instead of nagging about your spouse, try bragging about your spouse. Build them up, don’t tear them down. Focus on what they are doing right instead of always pointing out what they are doing wrong.” (Dave Willis)

“Fight less, cuddle more. Demand less, serve more. Text less, talk more. Criticize less, compliment more. Stress less, laugh more. Worry less, pray more. With each new day, find new ways to love each other even more.” (Dave Willis)

Much Love, Dr. Shermaine #EnjoyTheRead #BeInspired #BeEncouraged #BeEmpowered #BeChallenged #ShareTheWord

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“Preparing the Next Generation”

1 Peter 1:18-19, “You must know (recognize) that you were redeemed (ransomed) from the useless (fruitless) way of living inherited by tradition from your] forefathers, not with corruptible things [such as] silver and gold, but [you were purchased] with the precious blood of Christ (the Messiah), like that of a [sacrificial] lamb without blemish or spot.” (AMPC)

Now, I don’t fly much at all, however I must say, if I’m ever on an airplane flight where the flight attendant becomes incapacitated, I still think I might be able to do the safety instructions. I mean, I’ve heard them so many times (not so much as on the actual plane, as to commercials and movies). But I’ve still heard the script often enough that I could repeat it word for word. It’s been a few years since I was last on a plane, and they’ve indeed changed a few things. Actually, many airlines have now video-ized (my word) the presentation. It used to be the attendants who did it, but now in our overwhelmingly quick-paced world of technology, machines have got it covered. Most of you will remember the part where that little yellow oxygen mask would drop down from above your seat in their demonstration. Well, in the videos they have now, everyone is wonderfully calm in this simulated oxygen problem. I’m sure that’s very true-to-life…NOT! Well, on one of the videos I’ve seen, it shows a mother putting the mask on herself, and then on her little girl. The instructions script goes like this: “If the cabin pressure drops, get the oxygen to your face first, and then to your child’s.“

Listen: When it’s crunch time on an airplane flight, you have to first get for yourself the oxygen you need as a parent, then you can give your son or daughter what they need. And in these increasingly challenging days for parents and dangerous days for our children, we’ve got to (First) breathe deeply what our children need so we can then pass it on to them.

Over the years of youth and family work that I’ve been involved in, I have often been asked by a parent, “Can you help my son or daughter?” Often, the most helpful answer I would love to share is, “Can we get the oxygen to you First, Before we try to get it to them?”

Think about it: How many times has our child’s weakness been a mirror of our own, their failure a mirror of our failure, their baggage, their needs? It’s kind of like my child, my mirror. Which means I have to get me fixed First before I can fix my son or daughter. But how in the world do we change things about ourselves that we haven’t been able to change all these years?

The answer can be found in 1 Peter 1:18-19 it says, “You must know (recognize) that you were redeemed (ransomed) from the useless (fruitless) way of living inherited by tradition from your] forefathers…” (AMPC)

Believe it or not, but we have all gotten some very destructive hand-me-down ways of living from our parents who probably got those same hurting ways from their parents, and so on and so on. And even though we may have been determined not to reproduce some of those traits, (even the ones we’ve hated), truth is, many of us have still ended up duplicating instead of destroying harmful family traditions. There they are popping up in our generation; marking (or better yet scarring) another generation. And unless their hold can be stopped in our generation, we’ll pass on the bruises instead of the blessings to further future generations!

Until we can find the spiritual oxygen needed, we’ll never be able to help breathe new life into the next generation.

Admit it, or deny it, but we’ve all got ways of doing things we have long wanted to change, and for a long time: things like our temper, our negative attitude, our lack of discipline, our critical tongue, this addictive personality, this controlling personality, this lack of affection, this dishonesty. We’ve all inherited some family traditions that need not be passed down any further. Which is why we have to take into account what the Bible instructs us:

“You must know (recognize) that you were redeemed (ransomed) from the useless (fruitless) way of living inherited by tradition from your] forefathers…”

This is the first thing we must be honest about, granddad and grandma didn’t pass the best of traditions to mom and dad, and mom and dad didn’t pass on the best traditions to us. And since we’re being honest, let’s be all the way honest, WE, have not passed down the best traditions to our children. Sure, we’ve passed on photos, family recipes or holiday traditions, but for many of us we’ve also passed on that cussing tongue; that resentment, bitterness, hate, anger, jealousy, competition, comparisons, and unforgiveness. We’ve taught our children (via our own speech and behavior) that it’s ‘okay’, when clearly it is not. They’ve listened to us gossiping about church folks, then going to church to pray, praise and worship! Or we’ll tell them the importance of going to Sunday School; Bible Study; Prayer and Morning Worship (while we’re shopping at Macy’s during Sunday School; at the Movies during Bible Study; watching our favorite Television show during Prayer or at IHop during Morning Worship).

People of God, we have to demonstrate better examples of Christian Conduct before our children if we want them to emulate the Right things about us (because trust me, whether we want them to or not, they will emulate much of what they see us do).

Warning: Our Children Will Embrace and Emulate What We Entertain!

Remember, the Scripture makes it clear, “…from the useless (fruitless) way of living INHERITED BY TRADITION FROM YOUR] FOREFATHERS…” We have taught them far too many lessons on failure; compromise; excuses; blame and the like. We have to reverse this or the next generation will produce more “…useless, fruitless…” ways of living. And after all, who wants that as their family legacy?

Do you honestly want to live in such a way that you pass on to your children (who will pass on to your grandchildren and so on) ways that are displeasing to God? Do you want them to spit out your verbal vomit of disrespect because that’s all you taught them to digest?

Listen, as much as we like to talk negatively about the next generation, let’s be real, some of that stuff they received from us. Many didn’t learn to smoke, drink, cuss, lie and steal from the streets, no, they learned that in the house! Many didn’t learn to be lazy, unaccountable, undependable, from the streets, no, they learned that in the house! Many are in insurmountable debt and owning absolutely nothing of substantial worth, because they learned such behavior in the house! Do you really want our children to live in such a manner that their future is useless and fruitless, and all because they learned such acceptable behavior in the house?!

And this goes far beyond just our personal homes. This addresses the House of God, which addresses us as leaders in God’s house. Are we setting proper examples for the youth in our ministries and churches? Are we correcting them, empowering them, instructing them, and encouraging them? Or do we simply give them a little something to do so they can stay out of our hair?

Are we teaching them to tithe, to give offering, to respect authority, to lead well, to be faithful, dedicated and committed? Are we teaching them how to handle conflict on an auxiliary so they’ll know how to handle conflict on a team? Are we coming to the house of God together, as a family, or are we teaching them that it’s okay if we worship in bits and pieces?

Saints, we have to DO better or they will never BE better! And that’s the goal, to make the next generation better than the previous one. To show growth, maturity, and fruitfulness. But to do so, we’ve got to put the oxygen masks on ourselves first!

Which means, we can’t tell them to pull up their sagging pants when the panty-lines of the preachers are exposed; the cleavage of the worship leaders are hanging out and the youth leaders need someone to wrap a tablecloth around their legs before the whole congregation can see where babies come from! How can we tell them not to lie, cuss, steal and gossip, when we do? How can we tell them to go to church, while we stay home and send them with grandma or auntie? How can we tell them not to drink, smoke, or have sex or babies out of wedlock, when we do? How do we tell them to grow up, but we as leaders can roll our eyes, suck our teeth and walk all the way on the other side of the church just so we don’t have to walk past Brother “I Can’t Stand Him”, or Sister “She Makes Me Sick?” How do we tell them the importance of giving to God, when they see us purchase more at the mall in one day than we’ve put in the offering plate all year long?

In a nutshell, we’ve got to do and be better, so they can as well! 

Let’s change us and we won’t have to worry about changing them (they’ll simply follow the examples we’ve set) and this time, it will be worth the imitation.

Let’s prepare the next generation by making the necessary changes in ourselves, first. Let’s show them the fruit they are to produce: Galatians 5:22-25, “But the fruit of the Spirit [the result of His presence within us] is love [unselfish concern for others], joy, [inner] peace, patience [not the ability to wait, but how we act while waiting], kindness, goodness, faithfulness,  gentleness, self-control. Against such things there is no law.  And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature together with its passions and appetites. If we [claim to] live by the [Holy] Spirit, we must also walk by the Spirit [with personal integrity, godly character, and moral courage—our conduct empowered by the Holy Spirit].” (AMP)

This is the fruit we want them to reap and reproduce! And they can, if only we would begin planting the proper seeds.

Our children (both biological, spiritual, and all those we come into influential contact with) need to see in us what they will one day see in themselves. Let’s start reflecting now faith, hope, trust, holiness, kindness, goodness…let’s show them what it means to be the Image and Likeness of God. Let’s expose them to the Christ-Like Character and Conduct that Every Believer Should Possess.

If we love them, let’s help them.

1 Timothy 4:11-14, “Get the word out. Teach all these things. And don’t let anyone put you down because you’re young. Teach believers with your life: by word, by demeanor, by love, by faith, by integrity. Stay at your post reading Scripture, giving counsel, teaching. And that special gift of ministry you were given when the leaders of the church laid hands on you and prayed—keep that dusted off and in use.” (MSG)

This is the example we want to set for them. Let’s teach them, by word, by demeanor, by love, by faith, by integrity. And in teaching them in this manner, they will one day emulate us and teach us in the same manner. And we will have started a cycle of blessing instead of a cycle of cursing. Let’s share the reading of the Word with them, give them wise counsel and teach them. And let us also be so active in the gifts God has granted us, that our children will be inspired to do the same. Let’s show them the excitement of ministry, so that we fan their inner flame into a blaze, and they beat us to the house of God!

Our children need to see us reading, studying, applying and living the Bible, so they copy our character as they build their own. They need to see and hear us praying (often), (publicly and privately), so they can emulate. They need to see us visible and active and happy in the house of God, so that they will not view it as a place you have to go, instead of it being the place you want to go to most. Let them see us behave as believers so they’ll know what it looks like, sounds like, and should be like.

Let’s prepare the next generation by getting the baton of blessings (and behavior) ready to pass on to them. Let’s give them what we desire them to give to the generation after them. Let’s help them to do and be better than we ever were, and let’s teach them to do it quickly, young, and authentically. Let’s expose them to the joy of living for God.

We’ve passed on enough poor examples to the next generation, now let’s change us so we can help change them. Let’s get our oxygen masks on, get what we need to get so we’re prepared to give them what they need to receive. Our youth are not a lost cause, we simply need to care enough to reflect to them what they should mirror!

Today, let’s prepare them for bigger, better and greater, and that has nothing to do with money! But let’s prepare them instead to have bigger hearts, better attitudes, and greater integrity.

And if God were ever to ask us what we did to help the next generation, let us be able to rejoice…and not regret!

Psalm 145:4, “Generation after generation stands in awe of Your work; each one tells stories of Your mighty acts.” (MSG)

Matthew 19:13-15, “One day children were brought to Jesus in the hope that He would lay hands on them and pray over them. The disciples shooed them off. But Jesus intervened: “Let the children alone, don’t prevent them from coming to Me. God’s kingdom is made up of people like these.” After laying hands on them, He left.” (MSG)

 “God put us here to prepare this place for the next generation. That’s our job. Raising children and helping the community, that’s preparing for the next generation.” (Dikembe Mutombo)

“The most important business of one generation is the raising of the next generation. Nothing else you do in life will be as deeply satisfying.” (George Will)

“What one generation tolerates, the next generation will embrace.” (John Wesley)

“The future belongs to those who give the next generation reason for hope.” (Pierre Teilhard de Chardin)

“Both man and woman have their own parts to play in bringing faith to the next generation.” (William Wilberforce)

“Try to do for the next generation of church leaders what the previous generation of church leaders has not done for you.” (Andy Stanley)

“If the church marries herself to the spirit of the times, she will find herself a widow in the next generation.” (Charles Stanley)

“Pass the truth to the next generation. Teach them early what we learned late.” (Emily’s Quotes)

“The more we idealize the past and refuse to acknowledge our childhood sufferings, the more we pass them on unconsciously to the next generation.” (Alice Miller)

“The empty nest comes quickly. Do not squander your most precious privilege of participating in the lives of your children.” (Dr. James Dobson)

“Life affords no greater responsibility, no greater privilege, than the raising of the next generation.” (C. Everett Koop)

Much Love, Dr. Shermaine #EnjoyTheRead #BeInspired #BeEncouraged #BeEmpowered #BeChallenged #ShareTheWord

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“BUT GOD!”

1 Chronicles 28:2-3, “Then David the king rose to his feet and said, Hear me, my brethren and my people. I MYSELF INTENDED to build a house of rest for the ark of the covenant of the Lord, as a footstool for our God, and I prepared materials for the building. BUT GOD said to me, You shall not build a house for My Name [and Presence], because you have been a man of war and have shed blood” (AMP).

“…I MYSELF INTENDED…BUT GOD…”

Vincent’s passion for ministry led him to the Belgian coalfields where he preached to miners, tended the injured, fed the hungry and earned a place in the people’s hearts. His church was filled to capacity with those eager to learn about Jesus. But his superiors weren’t happy because Vincent wore cast-offs, lived in a shack and gave his salary to the people. “You look worse than the people you came to teach,” they said. “Wouldn’t Jesus have done the same?” Vincent asked. His bosses disagreed and he was dismissed from the ministry. He was hurt and angry; his only desire had been to build a church that glorified God, so why hadn’t God let it happen? Then one day he watched an old miner struggling beneath a load of coal. Moved by the sight he began to sketch the bowed figure. And although he didn’t realize it at the time, he’d discovered his Real calling. The young preacher who was rejected by his denomination eventually became an artist the world will long remember: Vincent van Gogh!

With that thought, how do you react to the “…BUT GOD…” interruptions in your life? Do you fuss and fume, or do you look for His hand in them? Understandably, Vincent was not happy at all that the one thing he desired to do, he could no longer do. Why? Because God had a different set of plans! And can you imagine what the world of art would be like without Vincent van Gogh? Can you imagine the void from his absence in artistry? There’s a quote I’ve recently come across that states: “Sometimes, the Interruption is the Assignment.” But let’s be honest, who do you know of that gets excited about interruptions? After all, its very definition states: “to stop the continuous progress of; to break the continuity of something.” Its Latin Origin ‘interrumpere’ literally means, ‘to break.’ And if it’s two things we do not like, it’s to be interrupted and to be broken! But oftentimes that’s when God does His best work in our lives. One, when we’re interrupted, because we have a tendency to be busy little beavers working on dam’s God never assigned us to build! And two, we also have a tendency to be arrogant when we have it supposedly altogether! So God interrupts and breaks us so He can get our hands on the right blueprints for building and so we can be made humble before He honors us! Saints, I encourage you to learn how to embrace both interruptions and brokenness, for in them lies God’s greatest plans, purpose and direction!

Jeremiah 29:10-11, “This is God’s Word on the subject…I’ll show up and take care of you as I promised and bring you back home. I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.” (MSG)

Proverbs 16:3, “Commit your works to the Lord [submit and trust them to Him], And your plans will succeed [if you respond to His will and guidance].” (AMP)

Our plans will always work, when they’re rightly aligned with His Plans and Purpose!

Proverbs 19:21, “Many plans are in a man’s mind, But it is the Lord’s purpose for him that will stand (be carried out).” (AMP)

Truth is, all of us will experience “…BUT GOD…” moments in life. I wanted to marry that man/woman…BUT GOD! I wanted to go to that school…BUT GOD! I wanted to accept that job…BUT GOD! I wanted to purchase that house…BUT GOD! I wanted to start that business…BUT GOD! I wanted to have a baby…BUT GOD! I wanted to start a church…BUT GOD! I wanted to relocate…BUT GOD! I wanted to throw in the towel and call it quits…BUT GOD! So, how do you handle the “…BUT GOD…” interruptions in life?

Let’s take a listen in and see if David has some advice for us: David said, “I…intended to build a…home for the ark…BUT GOD said…’ Your son Solomon…shall build My house” (1 Chronicles 28:2-6 NASB). Now, I can’t speak for you, but if I were David, I would’ve been a bit upset. Can I be truthful with you?! God, this is me, David, King David at that! I’m Your friend! I’m the Anointed One! I’m the one You sought after and declared to all that I Have a Heart After You! How can You skip over me and give this assignment to someone ‘less qualified than’ me? And for Solomon? He’s my son and all, and that’s wonderful, but he’s young and inexperienced, and You’ve never said about him the things You’ve said about me. Surely, I’m more qualified than he, surely I would make a better architect than he? Why am I, of all people receiving a “…BUT GOD…”?

However, when God nixed his plans, David didn’t respond as I may have, instead, he immediately followed his “…BUT GOD…” with a “…YET GOD…” and declared, “YET, the Lord, the God of Israel, chose me from all the house of my father to be king over Israel forever. For He has chosen Judah to be a leader; and in the house of Judah, my father’s house, and among the sons of my father He took pleasure in me to make me king over all Israel” (1 Chronicles 28:4 NASB)

You see, instead of complaining about what he DIDN’T get to do, David rejoiced in how God had ALREADY blessed him by promoting him from herding sheep to leading the Israelite nation! Amazing! But isn’t perspective and gratitude two things that can make all the difference?! It’s not about how we see it, it’s about looking at everything through God’s Perspective!

I wonder if we were asked would we be able to say we respond to our “…BUT GOD…” moments with a “…YET GOD…” declaration? Instead of murmuring and complaining, comparing and competing, David celebrates what the Lord has already granted him. Going forward, will you mature to David’s level of leadership and trust God’s plan, even when it differs from the one you intended? You see, the word ‘intended’ means ‘planned.’ Therefore, it’s not like David was sitting on his hands and just making wishes, goals, aims and hopes. When he says ‘he intended’, it means he already made plans. Listen to the text again: “…I MYSELF INTENDED to build a house of rest for the ark of the covenant of the Lord, as a footstool for our God, and I PREPARED MATERIALS FOR THE BUILDING. BUT GOD…” This wasn’t a let’s see what happens, this was a watch and see what happens. David wasn’t passive or lazy or procrastinating, no, he intended for his plans to come to pass for he already started making preparations! So, what do you do when you’re not simply sharing a good idea moment, but your BUT GOD, steps in when you’ve calculated all the numbers, you’ve assembled the team, you’ve drawn up the blueprints, you already know what it’s going to be named and the completion date is already scheduled in ink in your mind. Until God Steps In And Interrupts Your Process, Progress and Plans with a BUT GOD moment! How do you handle it?!

Well, while you think that over, let’s look at another “…BUT GOD…” Interruption:

“Beloved, my whole concern was to write to you in regard to our common salvation. [BUT] I found it necessary and was impelled to write you and urgently appeal to and exhort [you] to contend for the faith which was once for all handed down to the saints [the faith which is that sum of Christian belief which was delivered verbally to the holy people of God].” (Jude 1:3 AMP).

Jude’s WHOLE CONCERN was to write one thing, BUT he found it more necessary and impelling to write urgently about something else. You see, BUT GOD moments aren’t just from God. When you learn to align your faith and hearing and godly wisdom with God, there are some thing’s where your spirit will put a pause on your plans! When you learn how to move according to God’s purpose and plans you can stop yourself and say, ‘I know I desired to do that, and there was nothing wrong with it, but there is an urgency in my spirit to do this instead.’ You’ll learn how to sharpen your perspective to such a degree that you’ll input BUT GOD moments in the middle of your own plans!

Max Lucado writes, “I awoke early one morning for a meeting…[and] spotted a bag of cookies. Our daughter had attended a bake sale so I thought she must’ve set them out for me. I ate one…interesting texture…I ate a second…with coffee it made an interesting option. I grabbed a third for the road, and would have grabbed the fourth but only one remained. Later my wife phoned, ‘Looks like someone’s been in the bag.’ ‘It was me,’ I admitted. ‘I’ve had better breakfast cookies but those weren’t bad.’ ‘Those weren’t breakfast cookies,’ she replied, ‘they were homemade dog biscuits!’ His response? ‘All day when I scratched my belly, my leg kicked…not to mention my new found interest in fire hydrants!’ Moral of the Story: I SHOULD’VE CONSULTED THE MAKER FIRST BEFORE BECOMING A PARTAKER!”

As comical as that may sound, it is actually the truth for many of us. We just make choices without ever considering the consequences. And honestly the consequences wouldn’t be so harsh if we first consulted God before making our choices!

James 1:5, “If any of you lacks wisdom [to guide him through a decision or circumstance], he is to ask of [our benevolent] God, who gives to everyone generously and without rebuke or blame, and it will be given to him.” (AMP)

In Max Lucado’s story, could you imagine how different this scenario could’ve gone, had he FIRST asked permission to take what didn’t belong to him in the FIRST place? And even if he thought it was for him, how bad could it have hurt to simply ask “are these for me”? Because the Bible does not lie: “There is a way which SEEMS right to a man and APPEARS straight before him, but at the end of it is the way of death” (Proverbs 14:12 AMP). Often many of us suffer because we chose what SEEMED and APPEARED right! But had we asked God for clarity, we would have SEEN it for what it really was, a Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing! God alone can see clearly behind the mask, the makeup and the materials! You simply cannot hide behind the disguise of someone who is the creator of Discernment! So why not ask Him first?! Which is why the Bible says, “[Not in your own strength] for it is God Who is all the while effectually at work in you [energizing and creating in you the power and desire], both to will and to work for His good pleasure and satisfaction and delight” (Philippians 2:13 AMP). It’s not your work, it’s His Work In You that brings Him Good Pleasure and Satisfaction and Delight! We have a bad tendency to get this backwards!

When you sense “A Hold” in your spirit, it’s more than likely God Himself trying to get your attention! Remember: He promised to, “…guide you along the BEST pathway for your life…advise you and watch over you.” (Psalm 32:8 NLT). Did you catch that? When God guides you, you will always be found traveling down the BEST pathway for your life! Not so-so, not alright, not pretty good, but when God guides, you only go down the BEST road! Who would be foolish enough to go at it alone when this is the promise from God Himself? The Worse Thing You Can Do Is Ignore The Best Advice, Which Is Following God’s Guidance!

Remember: Jude said, “I wanted very much to write you about salvation…BUT I felt the need to write…about something else.” Jude wanted to dedicate his epistle to one topic, BUT GOD had other plans! And as you well know, you cannot alter God’s Plan! And as great as His plans are, who would want to? “This is God’s Word on the subject:…I’ll show up and take care of you as I promised and bring you back home. I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.” (Jeremiah 29:10-11 MSG). I reiterate, who would dare mess up plans like those?

A century ago F.B. Meyer wrote, “Are you in difficulty about your way? Go to God…get direction from the light of his smile or the cloud of his refusal…wait there silent and expectant, though all around you insist on immediate decision or action – the Will of God will be made clear; and you’ll have a new conception of God.” If only we’d finally learn the benefit and blessing of going to God for direction, and sitting quietly and patiently until we receive it…

Which reminds us a lot of Proverbs 16:9, “You may make your plans, BUT GOD directs your actions” (GNT). Those “…BUT GOD…” moments are everywhere! That’s why it’s so important that you don’t take a step in ANY direction without FIRST receiving God’s DIRECTIONS!

It’s said when Columbus set out he didn’t know where he was GOING, when he arrived he didn’t know where he WAS, and when he returned he didn’t know where he’d BEEN! Truth is, from time to time we all need help knowing which direction to go; such as whether or not to relocate, take a certain job, or commit to a particular relationship. Which is why the Scripture says, “We should make plans – counting on God to direct us” (Proverbs 16:9 TLB).

Proverbs 3:5-12, “Trust God from the bottom of your heart; don’t try to figure out everything on your own. Listen for God’s voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; He’s the one who will keep you on track. Don’t assume that you know it all. Run to God…” (MSG)

Here’s an example, BEFORE making his decision, the Bible says, “…David ASKED THE LORD, “SHOULD I GO UP…” (2 Samuel 2:1 NLV). Now, that’s what you call a Wise Man! Might I ask, do you do the same? Do you ask or “Inquire” of the Lord? That word “Inquire” means “to ask for information.” Its Latin Origin “Inquirere”, from “Quaerere” literally means “Seek”. And what does the Bible say about “Seeking”? “BUT SEEK (AIM AT AND STRIVE AFTER) FIRST OF ALL HIS KINGDOM AND HIS RIGHTEOUSNESS (HIS WAY OF DOING AND BEING RIGHT), AND THEN ALL THESE THINGS TAKEN TOGETHER WILL BE GIVEN YOU BESIDES” (Matthew 6:33 AMP) I would definitely, without a doubt, say that often we go wrong because we don’t First Seek God for the Right way to go!

And why is it so important that we go to God first for direction? Because, truth is, you never know what God will do, say or think because the Scripture holds true: “This plan of mine is not what you would work out, neither are my thoughts the same as yours! For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than yours, and my thoughts than yours.” (Isaiah 55:8-9 TLB).

Which is why we should further follow the advice found in the book of Jeremiah: “ASK ME and I will tell you some remarkable secrets about what is going to happen here” (Jeremiah 33:3 TLB). And what’s the benefit of ASKING? The Bible says, “ASK, AND YOU WILL BE GIVEN WHAT YOU ASK FOR. Seek, and you will find. Knock, and the door will be opened.” (Matthew 7:7 AMP)

People of God, if you would simply ASK GOD, you may better understand the BUT GOD and therefore render to Him a YET GOD trust that has no room for fear, doubt, panic, worry, fret, unbelief or hurry!

Ask God so He can direct you! And how does He direct us? In a variety of ways, but here’s 3 in a nutshell:

1…HIS WORD: “Let the peace of Christ keep you in tune with each other, in step with each other. None of this going off and doing your own thing. And cultivate thankfulness. LET THE WORD OF CHRIST—THE MESSAGE—HAVE THE RUN OF THE HOUSE. GIVE IT PLENTY OF ROOM IN YOUR LIVES. Instruct and direct one another using good common sense. And sing, sing your hearts out to God! Let every detail in your lives—words, actions, whatever—be done in the name of the Master, Jesus, thanking God the Father every step of the way.” (Colossians 3:15-17 MSG). One author writes: “The Bible is to God what a surgical glove is to a surgeon. He reaches through it to touch deep within you.” But that requires reading it, personalizing it, and acting on it. And often the reason we stay in the stuff we’re in so long is because we don’t turn to the Word of God which is the instrument He uses to get us out! “He sends forth His Word and heals them and rescues them from the pit and destruction” (Psalm 107:20 AMP). We could get out of a world of trouble, if only we’d get into the Word of God!

2…PRAYER AND LISTENING FOR HIS VOICE: Jesus said, “My sheep listen to My voice. I know them and they follow Me.” (John 10:27 CEB). And Isaiah adds, “And if you leave God’s paths and go astray, you will hear a voice behind you say, “No, this is the way; walk here.” (TLB). Can you imagine being so loved by God that He watches everywhere you go, and even when you go wrong, His voice is right there telling you how to get right back on track? Psalm 119:9-16, “How can a young person live a clean life? By carefully reading the map of Your Word. I’m single-minded in pursuit of You; don’t let me miss the road signs You’ve posted. I’ve banked Your promises in the vault of my heart so I won’t sin myself bankrupt. Be blessed, God; train me in Your ways of wise living. I’ll transfer to my lips all the counsel that comes from Your mouth; I delight far more in what You tell me about living than in gathering a pile of riches. I ponder every morsel of wisdom from You, I attentively watch how You’ve done it. I relish everything You’ve told me of life, I won’t forget a word of it.” (MSG). If you want to stay on Track, Follow carefully the Directions of the Map of God’s Word! I would even dare say that we often travel down the wrong path so long, not because God isn’t speaking and giving us direction, but because we’re simply not listening! James 1:19, “Understand this, my beloved brothers and sisters. Let everyone be quick to hear [be a careful, thoughtful listener], slow to speak [a speaker of carefully chosen words and], slow to anger [patient, reflective, forgiving];” (AMP). And what’s the best way to listen for His voice, PRAYER! “Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.” (Philippians 4:6-7 MSG).

3…WISE COUNSEL: “Without good direction, people lose their way; the more wise counsel you follow, the better your chances” (Proverbs 11:14 MSG); “Where there is no counsel, purposes are frustrated, but with many counselors they are accomplished” (Proverbs 15:22 AMP). Believe it or not, but others have sat where you are currently seated: “Remember your leaders who taught you the Word of God. Think of all the good that has come from their lives, and follow the example of their faith” (Hebrews 13:7 NLT). In other words, is your business floundering? Then talk to a successful businessperson. Are you experiencing a mid-life crisis? Before doing something you’ll regret, ask for help. Is your marriage failing? Then talk to a couple who’ve sat where you’re sitting, but they are standing strong now. Are your kids straying? Then talk to someone who knows what it feels like to see your kids go astray, and then return back to the path in which they were trained upon. Are your finances a mess? Then talk to someone who has managed to become financially secure and debt free. Are you insecure? Then talk to someone who can teach you about self-confidence. Believe it or not, but you are not the first one, the only one, or the last one! God has done it before and He will do it again. But you’ll never know that if you don’t talk to Wise Counselors! “Fools are headstrong and do what they like; wise people take advice” (Proverbs 12:15 MSG).

Remember: Life comes with a lot of “…BUT GOD…” moments, but when you grow in God, increase your prayer life, maintain your faith, refresh your hope, diligently study the Word of God, obey the voice of God, seek God for direction, trust and follow the plan, purpose and Will of God and surround yourself with wise counselors, you’ll become just like David, and find a “…YET GOD…” and be greatly encouraged even through your “…BUT GOD…” moments!

Psalm 73:26, “My flesh and my heart may fail, BUT GOD is the rock and strength of my heart and my portion forever.” (AMP)

Romans 5:8, “BUT GOD clearly shows and proves His own love for us, by the fact that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” (AMP)

2 Chronicles 20:15, “He said, “Listen carefully, all [you people of] Judah, and you inhabitants of Jerusalem, and King Jehoshaphat. The Lord says this to you: ‘Be not afraid or dismayed at this great multitude, for the battle is not yours, BUT GOD’S.” (AMP)

 “You may feel lost and alone, BUT GOD knows exactly where you are, and He has a good plan for your life.” (Author Unknown)

“Sometimes my plans fail, BUT GOD always gives me a better option.” (Author Unknown)

“You may have weaknesses, BUT GOD has strength. You may have sin, BUT GOD has grace. You may fail, BUT GOD remains faithful.” (Author Unknown)

“When we have nothing left, BUT GOD, we discover that God is enough.” (Author Unknown)

“The Bible is not man’s word about God, BUT GOD’S Word about man.” (John Barth)

“Sin does not stop God’s grace from flowing, BUT GOD’S grace will stop sin.” (Joseph Prince)

“My philosophy is: Life is hard, BUT GOD is good. Try not to confuse the two.” (Anne F. Beiler)

“People may do you wrong, BUT GOD will be your vindicator. Situations may look impossible, BUT GOD will do the impossible.” (Joel Osteen)

“Man gives you the award, BUT GOD gives you the reward.” (Denzel Washington)

“BUT, GOD knows best, I concluded.” (Anne Bronte)

“You may not understand it. It may not seem fair, BUT GOD knows what He’s doing.” (Author Unknown)

“BUT GOD is when God backspaces over a period and makes it a comma.” (Author Unknown)

“Things change, people change, places change, careers change, BUT GOD will never change!” (Author Unknown)

“The enemy will try to label you with everything you’ve done wrong. BUT GOD labels you forgiven, redeemed, and restored.” (Joel Osteen)

“Evil may have its hour, BUT GOD will have His day.” (Fulton J. Sheen)

“The devil is busy BUT GOD is busier. Always remember that God is in control.” (Lynette Lewis)

“It may look impossible, BUT GOD can do the impossible. Just because you don’t see anything happening doesn’t mean God is not working.” (Joel Osteen)

“The world changes constantly and dramatically, BUT GOD, His commandments, and promised blessings do not change. They are immutable and unchanging.” (Elder L. Tom Perry)

“When you have nothing left BUT GOD, you have more than enough to start over again.” (Mother Teresa)

“I’ve been let down, and knocked down, BUT GOD has never failed to help me up again.” (Author Unknown)

“The stars may fall, BUT GOD’S promises will stand and be fulfilled.” (J.I. Packer)

“Circumstances may appear to wreck our lives and God’s plans, BUT GOD is not helpless among the ruins. God’s love is still working. He comes in and takes the calamity and uses it victoriously, working out His wonderful plan of love.” (Eric Liddell)

“It’s true my father abused me and didn’t love and protect me the way he should have, and at times it seemed no one would ever help me and it would never end. BUT GOD always had a plan for my life, and He has redeemed me.” (Joyce Meyer)

“The facts may tell you one thing. BUT GOD is not limited by the facts. Choose faith in spite of the facts.” (Joel Osteen)

“Good is not always God’s Will, but God’s Will is always good.” (Watchman Nee)

“You don’t have to respond to those who attack, belittle, or insult you. You may not see it, BUT GOD is dealing with them. If they persist, He will arrange their harvest in such a way that they’ll know it’s because of what they did to you.” (Hart Ramsey)

“Life may not be fair, BUT GOD is always faithful.” (Toby Mac)

“I got to that desperate place where nobody could help me BUT GOD.” (Cheryl James)

“People are fickle. They’ll love you today, and leave you tomorrow. BUT GOD made you a promise that He’ll never leave you or forsake you. That you can bank on!” (Marvin Sapp)

“Man plans, BUT GOD arranges.” (Thomas A. Kempis)

“No matter what may be happening today, God has good things in store for your future! It may not be easy to see now, BUT GOD has already lined up a new beginning, new friendships and new opportunities just for you.” (Joel Osteen)

“When our deepest desire is not the things of God, or a favor from God, BUT GOD Himself, we cross a threshold.” (Max Lucado)

“God loves you simply because He has chosen to do so. He loves you when you don’t feel lovely. He loves you when no one else loves you. Others may abandon you, divorce you, and ignore you, BUT GOD will love you always. No matter what!” (Max Lucado)

“We can’t always see where the road leads, BUT GOD promises there’s something better up ahead we just have to trust Him.” (Author Unknown)

“Bottom Line: God will not allow any person to keep you from your destiny. They may be bigger, stronger, or more powerful, BUT GOD knows how to shift things around and get you to where you’re supposed to be.” (Joel Osteen)

“Your miracle may be taking a long time. BUT GOD did not bring you this far to leave you.” (Toby Mac)

“Trust God to make a way. Sometimes we can only see what’s in front of us, BUT GOD sees the big picture.” (Author Unknown)

Much Love, Dr. Shermaine #EnjoyTheRead #BeInspired #BeEncouraged #BeEmpowered #BeChallenged #ShareTheWord #HappyGoodFriday

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