Psalm 51:16-17, “Going through the motions doesn’t please You, a flawless performance is nothing to You…” (MSG)
Me and my eldest daughter, Mo’Nae, absolutely love one particular movie that we’ve seen a million times. And yet, if it came on again tonight, we would both be crazy glued to the television as if we’ve never seen the movie before; have no idea of the plot and characters; as if we’re clueless as to how the movie ends. Sounds crazy, but it’s true. And what movie might you ask that has caused us such devoted repetition? Well, it’s called, “Catch Me If You Can”! And it’s based on a true story. You see, Frank Abagnale, Jr. lived a wild and crazy life as a doctor, airline pilot, banker, investor, attorney and celebrity. But before you assume that he must have been the most talented and gifted person to ever walk the face of the earth, listen to this: The Irony Is, He Was Never Authentically Any of Those! And even though he deserves an academy award for his portrayal of them, He Was a Fake, a Fraud, and a Pretender.
It all began early in his life when he realized he had the talent to convince people he was “somebody” through his sheer confidence and acting ability. However, he began to make money at his game and soon found himself addicted to role playing. And by the time it was all over, he’d helped perform surgery in an operating room, conned banks out of thousands of dollars, flown an airplane as a pilot, and gone to places most people only dream of going. The problem was – It Was All a Show!
Which reminds me of Psalm 51:16-17, “Going through the motions doesn’t please You, a flawless performance is nothing to You…” (MSG) At the end of the day, no matter how “flawless” you believe your performance was, it was still merely a performance. And no matter how awesome a Broadway show may be, at some point the actors bow, the curtains close, the audience leaves, and you have to lay down your costume-character and be the real you! That’s what happened to Frank.
A few years into it and he wanted out! The glamour was gone. He was desperate to come clean. But he had created such a web of deceit that it wasn’t easy. Which made me think of real actors, who have played a role for so long, people don’t know how to differentiate between the person and the part they play. For instance, I loved “Angie and Jessie” from All My Children. They were my all-time favorite soap opera couple. But I remember when I was younger, someone said to me, “you know you look a lot like Debbi Morgan”. I said, “really? Well who is she?” The person laughed and responded, “you don’t watch All My Children?” I said, “of course I do, that is when we have a day off from school”. She said “then how is it possible you don’t know who Debbi Morgan is?” I said, “I don’t remember a character on the show by that name.” The person laughed again, harder this time and said, “you know Angie, as in Jessie and Angie don’t you?” Well, of course I lost it by then. My response, “duh, who doesn’t know them, they’re my favorite. Angie is so pretty”. I reiterate, the person laughed…again…even harder than the last hard laugh! She said, “girl you do know Debbie is Angie? It’s her real name!” My jaw hit the floor. Truth is, I never thought of them as “characters”, Angie was really Angie! Well, what can I say, I only knew her as her “character”, I never knew the actual or real person behind the part being played.
And honestly, that’s a lot like many of us today, we’ve played our roles for so long, been in character for so long, read from the same script for so long, others (nor ourselves) can find the real us anymore. The danger in this is that we never live real and fulfilling lives. It’s always a show, a line always has to be remembered, we have to recall all the previous scenes and scripts. We pretend so long that we can’t find the real us under the layers of showmanship. That word “showmanship” is defined as “the manager or presenter of a circus or fair; a person skilled at entertaining, theatrical presentation, or performance.” And that’s what happens to us, we manage our lines, present a great show, we’re skilled at entertaining those we want to applaud us, we perform, no different than that of a circus act or fair! Such pretense is no different than imprisonment. And speaking of imprisonment, that’s exactly what happened to Frank. The FBI was onto him, and he ended up spending years in prison. Which makes me wonder, how many years of mental and emotional imprisonment have many of us suffered in because we never discovered the freedom of simply being ourselves. I agree wholeheartedly with Pastor Joel Osteen, “There’s a Freedom When You Can Be at Peace With NOT Being Perfect!” It is better to be Real, Imperfect You, than to be a Perfect Imitation of Someone You’re Not!
Another memory came to mind, and it’s when I was first saved. I wasn’t raised in church, and so all I had as examples were the women who were in my local church. They were older, and a lot more conservative. They wore conservative hairstyles, modest clothing and make-up, little heels but big hats. And little ole me trying to come from the streets to the other-side and “fit in”. And for many years, I was impressed with my own acting ability. I wore the long skirts, the wide-brim hats, the little touch of make-up, and of course I mastered the “church lingo”, knowing what to say, when to say it, how to say it, and who to say it around. And truth be told, those were the most miserable years of my entire life! I never felt like “me.” I was the young woman who loved to wear big hoop earrings, long box-braids, red fingernails, mini-skirts, black eyeliner (that I wore on my lips as well…lol!) Lord, I was a hot mess when I walked into that little church house. But if nothing else, I was authentically me. But then I came around people who were not like me and since I was the only “odd ball”, clearly I was the one who needed to change. I even remember the missionary that told me I had to stop wearing braids or I would never get a decent Christian husband. Don’t laugh, because I believed her! And so I stepped into character, and it took me well over a decade to step off the stage for the last time!
I look at a lot of my pictures from those days and very few have me smiling. I really wasn’t happy. I always felt trapped. I felt like a performing monkey. And no matter how horrible it made me feel, I lived by the motto, “the show must go on!”
Well, Frank had a great talent, but he wasted it pretending to be someone else. And I’m afraid, far too many of God’s children are doing the very same thing. We’re so busy performing for people who are performing themselves, that we never develop real character because we’re always playing one!
But listen to Paul’s words, “…I have finished the work I was to do…” Paul made it clear, my time-card is stamped with the time I actually put in to the work I was assigned to do! Not Timothy, not Barnabas, not John Mark, but I, Paul, have finished the work I was assigned to do! I wonder how many of us can claim that as our true testimony?
Listen, the reality is, you can only be yourself, because everyone else is taken! But the good news is, YOU are enough…as is!
Think about it, Paul wasn’t perfect! Listen to a portion of his life in 2 Corinthians 11:23-29: “I’ve worked much harder, been jailed more often, beaten up more times than I can count, and at death’s door time after time. I’ve been flogged five times with the Jews’ thirty-nine lashes, beaten by Roman rods three times, pummeled with rocks once. I’ve been shipwrecked three times, and immersed in the open sea for a night and a day. In hard traveling year in and year out, I’ve had to ford rivers, fend off robbers, struggle with friends, struggle with foes. I’ve been at risk in the city, at risk in the country, endangered by desert sun and sea storm, and betrayed by those I thought were my brothers. I’ve known drudgery and hard labor, many a long and lonely night without sleep, many a missed meal, blasted by the cold, naked to the weather. And that’s not the half of it, when you throw in the daily pressures and anxieties of all the churches…” (MSG)
Paul was authentically himself, even if being authentically himself was painful and unattractive! Paul suffered, but he was himself. Paul worked harder, went to jail, was beaten up, at the door of death, flogged, had rocks thrown at him, he was shipwrecked, had a hard time in travel, struggled with robbers, friends, foes, in the city and the country, baked by the desert sun and about to drown in a sea storm. He was betrayed, endured hard labor, he was lonely, sleepy, hungry, cold and naked, and still none of that tops the fact that he also had to fight with the pressures and anxieties of All the churches! And still Paul says, “…I have finished the work I was assigned to do…”!
Paul didn’t have it easy, but he remained true to himself, to his God, to the people he was responsible to lead and to his faith. And he did it all without pretense! And so can you!
Maybe your life’s journey has been as unappealing as Paul’s. Maybe you’ve had to wait on the unemployment line, wait for food stamps, wait for Medicaid, wait at the homeless shelter for a cot, wait at the soup kitchen for some crackers. However, your story is still beautiful even with some ugly chapters included! Truth is, we all have chapters in our life story that we don’t read aloud, and we certainly don’t share with others. However, God wants to bless YOU, not your character-role! He has blessings for you with your name on it but just as you have to show authentic ID to claim property, you’ll need to show the real you to claim your blessings! Angie can’t claim Debbi’s blessing, even if so many believe she’s one in the same. No, only one is real, authentic and identified! So it is the same with you.
Don’t waste your life away as Frank did.
Can you imagine though, who and what he could have actually become had he simply been himself?! And you are no different. So, don’t throw away who you can become by pretending to be someone else now. Be You! All of you! Imperfect, flawed, cracked, crazy-hair, crooked teeth, acne-faced, stretch-marked, out of shape YOU! No matter your marital status, financial status, leader or laity, no matter your educational background, your ethnicity, how many children you have or don’t have, how many divorces you’ve gotten, none of it matters! What matters most is that your are the Real you and that you finish the work that was given to you to complete!
Sarah couldn’t be Rebekah; Leah couldn’t be Deborah; David couldn’t be Judas; Esther couldn’t be Ruth; Peter couldn’t be John; Abigail couldn’t be Anna; Samson couldn’t be Jacob; Eli couldn’t be Matthew. And yet all of them were significant in Scripture, and none of them had to pretend to be someone else in order to accomplish it.
You are significant to the world, and more importantly to the Kingdom of God just as you are, the real you. Don’t dilute you; don’t masquerade you; don’t alter you; don’t attempt to be anyone else but you!
There’s a work for you to complete and a reward for you to receive, however, your “character” can’t complete your work nor receive your reward, only YOU can. Don’t forfeit your future by being a fraud. Ask the Lord what you are to do, and then do it. Ask the Lord who you are to be, then become it. Without excuse, apology, blame, or reason. You my friend, are enough. Be YOU, after all, there’s no one in all the world that can be YOU, except YOU!
“The day I pulled off the mask of pretense, fake happiness and put it in the trash – was the day when I peeped inside my heart and met my true self.” (Shilpi Sood)
“No one can long hide behind a mask; the pretense soon lapses into the true character.” (Seneca the Younger)
“Do they love you, or the mask you put on everyday?” (Shimika Bowers)
“Behind every mask there is a face, and behind that a story.” (Marty Rubin)
“Sometimes it’s not the people who change, it’s the mask that falls off.” (Author Unknown)
“If you want the great and mighty things God has for you, you must get to the root of anger and deal with it. Get rid of the masks and face the things that happened in your life that made you the way you are today. Admit that you can’t change by yourself. Until the root is removed, it’ll continue to produce one bad fruit after another.” (Joyce Meyer)
“Don’t be trapped behind a mask, acting out a life you don’t really want. Be honest with God and let Him remove your mask and replace it with a new you that doesn’t need to hide from the world.” (Author Unknown)
“It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.” (Andre Gide)
“Honesty and transparency make you vulnerable. Be honest and transparent anyway.” (Mother Theresa)
“Authenticity is the daily practice of letting go of who we think we’re supposed to be and embracing who we are.” (Brene Brown)
“There is nothing more beautiful than seeing a person being themselves. Imagine going through your day being unapologetically you.” (Jenny Garrett)
“By being yourself you put something wonderful in the world that was not there before.” (Edwin Elliot)
“Less Perfection, More Authenticity.” (Author Unknown)
“Don’t trade in your authenticity for approval.” (Author Unknown)
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” (Ralph Waldo Emerson)
“Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.” (Judy Garland)
“When you show up authentic, you create the space for others to do the same. Walk in your truth.” (Jenny Garrett)
“Remind yourself that you cannot fail at being yourself.” (Wayne W. Dyer)
“When you shine your own unique light in a way that only YOU can do, then, you are way beyond competition!” (Naralee)
“The real you is more interesting than the fake somebody else.” (Lauryn Hill)
“The most powerful lesson I’ve learned in life is to never act like someone you’re not. Not only will people know that you’re being fake, but you’re also fooling yourself by thinking that the REAL you isn’t good enough.” (Anthony Gucciardi)
Much Love, Dr. Shermaine #EnjoyTheRead #BeInspired #BeEncouraged #BeEmpowered #BeChallenged #ShareTheWord
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